Murphy's Devotions

2011-12-30T20:53:00.000-06:00

Cal and Sara Toerner have trained "Mike, the cat" well.

Geaux Tigers!!!!!!!!!!

2012 - Don't Fret

2011-12-30T20:47:00.001-06:00

No matter how dark life seems,

God will illuminate your path!!!!

(Photo and Quote - Murphy Toerner)

Psalm 4:1

2011-11-29T14:29:00.005-06:00

Psalm 4:1 - Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!

You have relieved me in my distress;

Be gracious to me and hear my prayer.

How often do you pick up your cell phone to call or text someone because something happened and you want to share your life with them. Why do we reach out like that, it's because we're "hard-wired" by God to connect with others.

David didn't need a cell phone to "call" God; he prayed. David KNOWS God pretty well. God is the source of all goodness and righteousness within him. Without God, David is helplessly flawed. David is a human being; God is perfectly divine. God consistently "answers" David when he "calls."

When God answers his "call," David experiences relief from his distress.

Today, when you find yourself wanting to call a friend to find relief from your distress, try calling, i.e., praying to God. Tell Him the details of your situation. Describe what your feelings are in this distressing moment. Pour your heart out to the One who always answers. You will find relief for your weary soul just as David did.

Reasons to Read the Psalms

2011-11-29T14:14:00.002-06:00

When you want ... Read

To find comfort Psalm 23

To meet God intimately Psalm 103

To learn a new prayer Psalm 136

To learn a new song Psalm 92

To learn more about God Psalm 24

To understand yourself more clearly Psalm 8

To know how to come to God each day Psalm 5

To be forgiven for your sins Psalm 51

To feel worthwhile Psalm 139

To understand why you need the Bible Psalm 119

To give praise to God Psalm 145

To know that God is in control Psalm 146

To give thanks to God Psalm 136

To please God Psalm 15

To know why you should worship God Psalm 104

God's Word was written to be studied, understood, and applied, and the book of Psalms lends itself most directly to application. (Life Application Study Bible, p.895)

"Reading the Psalms will change you from the inside out." - Murphy Toerner

The Illusion of Control

2011-11-25T16:03:00.001-06:00

Do you try to control situations and people in your life? Do you try to control your children, boyfriend/girlfriend, or your spouse? Do you use control as a means to gaining a sense of security?

A lot of people go through life trying to control circumstances and people, but the thought of successfully controlling anyone or anything is an illusion. When you really think about it, there is no such thing as control.

Somewhere along the way Christians embraced the idea that if their children looked perfect, acted perfect, and achieved a lot, then the parents proved they were good Christians. (Our children's performances don't prove anything. Anyone can "look good" on the outside, and yet, their hearts are far from God.

How do we control our children? We use threats, manipulation, and other things to get them to do what we want. How do we try to control our spouses? Again, we use threats, rejection, shame, criticism, withdrawal, or contempt. We say all sorts of things. We will even throw out the "D-word" (divorce) every now and then just to scare them into doing what we want.

We often attempt to control our sense of well-being and security by performing perfectly or having a huge groups of tennis buddies and Bible study friends. We think if we have enough money and resources we'll insulate ourselves from hardships and disappointments. If we can be the president of this organization or a leader of that committee, we will gain the status we seek. If we live in the most popular or pricey neighborhood, we believe people will respect us or look up to us.

All of these are aimed at gaining some sort of control over situations or people. Sadly, the idea of successfully controlling anyone or anything is truly an illusion. It can't be done. If you believe you can control people or situations, think again. In fact, you'd better rethink your entire approach to life because all of your effort to control will fail. You will continue to try, however, because you've bought into the illusion of control.

Think about it. Can you really make an 18 year old son or daughter consistently clean their room? Can you make your middle schooler make all A's and B's on their report card? Can you force your spouse to be on time? Can you make a spouse change their value system? Even if you threaten divorce, will that make your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend stop doing a specific annoying behavior? Can you control events? Can you make more good ones happen; and less bad ones? Can you guarantee financial security? Can you be certain that your house will never burn down or you'll never get into another car accident?

We can not control life, circumstances, events, or people. Truthfully, we can barely control ourselves at times. Thinking we can control anything is just an illusion promoted by our enemy.

Interestingly enough, God understands the illusion of control. He never tries to control us. If He wanted to control us, He could. All He'd have to do is turn off the air in the atmosphere for about 30 seconds. That would surely get our attention and our complete, albeit coerced, obedience. But God does not do that. He understands the illusion of control.

Are you currently trying to control someone or something. If so, please stop! It is an exercise in futility. Instead, turn to God; trust in God; rely on Him. Nothing can touch your life that hasn't passed through the loving hands of your Father in heaven.

Psalm 3:3

2011-11-18T12:09:00.000-06:00

November 18, 2011

Psalm 3 – vv. 3 (a Psalm of David, when he fled from Absalom his son)

v. 3. But You, O LORD, are a shield about me, my glory, and the One who lifts my head.

David addresses God as, “LORD.” David is acknowledging that Jehovah is the supreme authority in his life. He is LORD. God is the ultimate authority and the totally sovereign God of heaven and earth. When God commands and instructs, David’s job is to be obedient to his LORD.

David knows Jehovah as a perfect “shield about me,” meaning God totally protects David and nothing can touch David without passing through the hands of a loving, perfect, divine Father. David understands that all good comes from above from God and yet, in God’s permissive will, He will allow Satan to come against us in the form of troubles, trials, temptations, deceptions, seductions, and human enemies and adversaries. Yet, we must remember that Satan is always the real enemy.

David knows the GLORY of God, meaning God is worthy of all praise, honor, and distinction from His children and followers. David is also asserting that God, the LORD, is the sole source of David’s honor, fame, and admiration. David is great because the LORD has made him great. David’s character qualities and honorable choices are present because the Spirit of God is his consistent counselor and guide and when David listens to God, the LORD, life is better.

Lastly, David proclaims God, the LORD to be the lifter of his head. This means David has experienced the gentle care, nurture, love and healing of God as a healer or even a parent. Parents who love their children are kind and gentle when their children are struggling with a problem, crisis, or illness. When people adore us they will lovingly “lift our heads” and tend to us.

Question: Do you see something new about God in this verse? Hang on to it throughout the day and meditate on the new insight.

Psalm 1

2011-11-13T19:51:00.002-06:00

Psalm 1:1-3

1. How blessed is the man who does not walk in (practice) the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers!

2. But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and His law he meditates day and night.

3. He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season and its leaf does not wither; and in whatever he does, he prosper’s.

Psalm 1 instructs us to be firmly planted in God and the inference is to be grounded and rooted in His ways, His word, His law, and His essence.

What does this “look like”? To me it means that God is the first Person I think of when I wake up and the last Person to whom I say good night. He is ever present in my life. He directs my path. He encourages. He loves me completely just as He does all His children. I praise Him for the great things in my life; I praise Him for the hurdles. I am confident that He is with me always and He faithfully hears my cries. These are the things that make me “prosper.” It is my relationship with Him that gives me an abundant life no matter what my current circumstances are.

Are You In Debt?

2011-11-12T15:14:00.000-06:00

The 5 Dumbest Things You Can Do if You Have too Much Debt

If you’re struggling with too much debt, you’re not alone. It seems as if the whole nation has a borrowing hangover. For years, credit was easy and many people became overextended. But, we now live in an era of austerity and it’s time to get our affairs in order.

The five strategies you may want to avoid:

The first piece of advice from experts in the field is to be sure you don't make your situation worse by making common mistakes. In particular try to avoid:

1. Paying only the minimum payment on your debt, as this will result in the amount you owe actually growing, and your problems will only become worse.

2. Relying on friends and family, as this can damage relationships with the most important people in your life.

3. Unscrupulous credit counselors that demand cash upfront or high fees for help they promise, but don't deliver.

4. Using new high-interest loans to pay off lower interest rate loans. It may be easier to just have one payment. but it will actually increase the amount you have to pay back.

5. Declaring bankruptcy. This can have permanent and severe consequences on your financial future. Avoid it if you can, especially when debt settlement may work for you.

When To Love

2011-11-10T09:54:00.002-06:00

"Love me when I least deserve it,

because that's when I really need it."

Swedish Proverb

(Murphy-ism) God is ...

2011-11-02T23:33:00.003-05:00

(Photo by M. Toerner, 2011)

God is good; always good

and He can never be anything BUT GOOD!!!!

This truth is the framework within which all Christians

must place the puzzle pieces of their lives.

Dance in the Rain

2011-11-02T23:31:00.001-05:00

Don't Compare

2011-10-31T10:53:00.002-05:00

It's human nature to compare.

When we compare we are trying to gain a sense of, "How do I look compared to how you look? How am I performing compared to your performance? Is my house bigger or smaller than yours? Is my marriage as good or better than yours? Are my children better at "looking right" compared to yours?" The list of potential comparisons is endless.

In John 21:15-17, Jesus questions Peter three times concerning Peter's love for Him. Peter emphatically asserts his love for the Savior. This would have been a great place to end the chapter because Peter's commitment and devotion are powerful and admirable, but the chapter doesn't end.

In John 21:20-21, Peter shifts from walking in the Spirit to walking in his flesh, "Peter, turning around, saw the disciple who Jesus loved following them; the one who also had leaned back on (Jesus') bosom at the last supper (referring to the Apostle John). Peter says in verse 21, "Lord, and what about this man (pointing to John)?"

Comparing is a human phenomenon. God doesn't compare and He doesn't want us to compare either. In John 21:22, Jesus rebukes Peter, "If I want him (John) to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow Me!" Jesus directs Peter to get his eyes off John and maintain his focus and will on his personal obedience to Jesus.

Are you currently comparing something in your life with something in the life of another? Comparing fosters internal pride and gloating or it creates a deep sense of shame and feeling less than. Don't compare. Do what Jesus commanded Peter, keep your eyes on yourself and your personal walk with the Lord.

You Can't Reach ...

2011-10-27T12:03:00.000-05:00

God Told Me ...

2011-10-23T17:12:00.002-05:00

I was on Young Life staff for several years, first as a Staff Representative in Baton Rouge, LA and then as an Area Director in Bowling Green, KY. My time in Bowling Green was a wonderful time. Mike was teaching at Western Kentucky University (Go Hilltoppers!) and as a Young Life Area Director, I was blessed to have a great committee of adults and 18 leaders over our four years there. Many high school students came to know Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior through the ministry there.

When new leaders wanted to join our YL team, they attended "Leadership Training" for a year. Upon completion of the course, they made a verbal commitment to serve as a Young Life leader for two school years (unless they were a graduating senior.) This pledge was important because it was disruptive for the high school kids to have a lot of leadership turn-over in their Young Life Club. Young Life is a relationship ministry. Consistent relationships are foundational.

The two year commitment was never a problem until ... one day a leader who was in the middle of his/her first year of commitment said, "God told me that I'm supposed to quit leadership."

I thought the statement was interesting. Does God tell us to break our commitments? Since God is the epitome of a promise keeper, it seems He would not direct His children to break their pledge. It's possible that God might lead a person to do so, but not probable.

I released the leader from their commitment. I asked that he/she would consider praying to see if they were operating in their FLESH or truly following the SPIRIT.

Please be mindful when you use the phrase, "God told me to ______."

From a High School Friend

2011-10-18T20:30:00.001-05:00

Making the Journey

2011-10-18T14:36:00.002-05:00

Being a Christian and walking with Christ is a journey. I wish it were an effortless Journey; one with no detours or bumpy roads, but that isn't the case. If you have been a Christian for very long, you already know that it can feel like a roller-coaster ride. There are many detours along the way. Twists and turns can happen at any time on our spiritual highway. Every once in a while a Christian can experience a train wreck or a car crash; meaning they may have a child with cancer or a marriage that is falling apart.

What are we to do when the journey does not go the way we hoped (or silently demanded)?

The first thing some of us do is get angry and even enraged with God. It is amazing how we seem to blame God and treat Him as our enemy.

One thing you can do to when times are tough and the chaos of this world seems to be getting bigger and stronger: hunker down with a spirit of faith and humility. Don't rage at God; get still before Him. Trust that He is good, always good, and can never be anything but good. Trust that He is in control and He has you in the palm of His hand. This is the truth for every child of God.

How to Look at Trials

2011-10-16T12:10:00.004-05:00

James 1:2-4 "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, (3) knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. (4) And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

Have you ever had a spouse, a child, a friend, a relative, or a co-worker share the details of a current, personal trial or tribulation?

As a Christian counselor with 20 years of experience, I often heard such testimonies from clients. It's the nature of my job.

In an attempt to give the client a differing perspective, I have often asked some thought provoking questions, such as, "Can you think of how God is attempting to use your situation in an effort to accomplish a good, righteous, or Godly outcome?"

Sometimes I'll throw in, "Could God intentionally allow this trial as a viable way to get your attention?"

If the client chooses to stay in my office, I might ask, "Can you entertain the idea that God uses tests, trials, and tribulations because they are proven means for Him to break through our crusty defenses. Only through specific tests, trials, and tribulations is God able to gain access to your heart, your mind, and your will. In God's economy, brokenness is not a bad thing. It's one of His most powerful tools in our sanctification."

Clients don't much like hearing those questions and statements, but they are true none the less.

How would you respond to those questions and statements?

Please re-read the above passage: James 1:2-4 "Consider it good or joyful ...."

For the Scriptures to assert this, there must be a way to see earthly things from a Godly, Heavenly, Divine perspective.

How well are you able to do that?

Let's pray we all get better at it.

Tie Yourself to the Tree of Truth

2011-10-06T22:42:00.003-05:00

It is not uncommon for me to stop mid-sentence during a conversation and say, "That's not true." What I'm doing is stopping myself from saying something that I don't believe is 100 % true.

The reason why I do that is because I've learned that "the truth" really will set you free. So if I say something that is only 50 % true or 90 % true, I will stop what I am saying out loud and I will confront myself in mid-sentence.

I learned this technique during college. And in all sincerity, it saved my life.

Do you tell yourself the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? If not, it's time to start.

The truth will truly set you free. Trust me, I know.

Murphy

Common Disciplines by RENOVARE

2011-09-27T17:37:00.003-05:00

By God's grace, I will set aside time regularly for prayer, meditation, and spiritual reading and will seek to practice the presence of God.

By God's grace, I will strive mightily against sin and will do deeds of love and mercy.

By God's grace, I will welcome the Holy Spirit, exercising the gifts and nurturing the fruit while living in the joy and power of the Spirit.

By God's grace, I will endeavor to serve others everywhere I can and will work for justice in all human relationships and social structures.

By God's grace, I will share my faith with others as God leads and will study the Scriptures regularly.

By God's grace, I will joyfully seek to show forth the presence of God in all that I am, in all that I do, in all that I say.

Remember Me (The Death of a Loved One)

2011-09-24T17:18:00.002-05:00

Fill not your hearts with pain and sorrow,

but remember me in every tomorrow.

Remember the joy, the laughter, the smiles,

I've only gone to rest a little while.

Although my leaving causes pain and grief,

my going has eased my hurt,

and given me relief.

So dry your eyes and remember me,

not as I am now, but as I used to be.

Because, I will remember you all,

and look on with a smile.

Understand in your hearts,

I've only gone to rest a little while.

As long as I have the love of each of you,

I can live my life in the hearts of all of you.

(Unknown Author)

10 Signs of Caregiver Stress (ALZHEIMER'S)

2011-09-24T12:30:00.004-05:00

1. DENIAL - about the disease and its effects on the person who's been diagnosed. "I know my Mom's is going to get better."

2. ANGER - at the person with Alzheimer's or others that no effective treatments or cures currently exist and that people don't understand what's going on. "If he asks me that question one more time, I'll scream."

3. SOCIAL WITHDRAWAL - from friends and activities that once brought pleasure. "I don't care about getting together with the neighbors any more."

4. ANXIETY - about facing another day and what the future holds. "What happens when he needs more are than I can provide?"

5. DEPRESSION - begins to affect the ability to cope. "I don't care anymore."

6. EXHAUSTION - makes it nearly impossible to complete necessary daily tasks. "I'm too tired for this."

7. SLEEPLESSNESS - caused by a never-ending list of concerns. "What if she wanders out of the house or falls and hurts herself?"

8. IRRITABILITY - leads to moodiness and triggers negative responses and reactions. "Leave me alone."

9. LACK OF CONCENTRATION - makes it difficult to perform familiar tasks. "I was so busy, I forgot we had an appointment."

10. HEALTH PROBLEMS - begin to talk their toll, both mentally and physically. "I can't remember the last time I felt good."

Pass this on to a caregiver you know!!!

Time To Adore by Ruth Bell Graham (Collected Poems, 1977)

2011-09-22T11:50:00.003-05:00

And when I die, I hope my soul ascends slowly,

so that I may watch the earth receding out of sight,

Its vastness growing smaller as I rise,

savoring its recession with delight.

Anticipating joy is itself a joy.

And joy unspeakable and full of glory

needs more than than, "in the twinkling of an eye,"

more than, "in a moment."

LORD, who am I to disagree?

It's only we have much to leave behind;

so much . . .

Before, these moments of transition will, for me,

be time to adore.

The Whole Thing - The Prayer of Serenity

2011-09-14T20:16:00.003-05:00

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;


Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

--Reinhold Niebuhr

Let No Unwholesome Word ...

2011-09-05T16:21:00.003-05:00

We live in a world that is dominated with negativism, sarcasm, one-ups-manship and other means of relating and communicating that are counter-productive and destructive. Even Christians engage in verbal jousting and sarcasm. Being witty and genuinely funny are wonderful qualities, but some of us go well beyond wit and playfulness.

What does it mean that "no unwholesome word should proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification?"

Invite the Holy Spirit to teach you how you are to apply this scripture to your present day life.

Murphy's Devotions: Top Ten Relational Needs ...

2011-07-04T18:07:00.000-05:00

Murphy's Devotions: Top Ten Relational Needs ...: "1. Acceptance - receiving others willingly and unconditionally (even when their behavior is imperfect) and loving them in spite of any diffe..."

Top Ten Relational Needs ...

2011-07-04T18:03:00.001-05:00

1. Acceptance - receiving others willingly and unconditionally (even when their behavior is imperfect) and loving them in spite of any differences that may exist between you.

2. Affection - expressing care and closeness through physical touch and through words such as, "I love you," or "I care about you."

3. Appreciation - expressing thanks, praise, or commendation, particularly in recognition of someone's accomplishments or efforts.

4. Approval (Blessing) - building up or affirming another person, particularly for who they are (as opposed to what they do); affirming both the fact and the importance of our relationship with another person.

5. Attention - conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care, taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds.

6. Comfort - responding with care to a hurting person through words, actions, emotional responses, and physical touch; hurting with and for others in the midst of their grief or pain.

7. Encouragement - urging others to persist and persevere in their efforts to attain their goals; stimulating others toward love and good deeds.

8. Respect - valuing one another highly, treating one another as important, and honoring one another with our words and actions.

9. Security - establishing and maintaining harmony in our relationships and providing freedom from fear or threat of harm through expressions of vulnerability, deepening of trust, and the successful resolution of conflict.

10. Support - coming along side others and providing gentle, appropriate assistance with a problem or struggle.

Murphy J Foster told me about these and I wanted to pass them on to you. Love, Murphy T.

Murphy's Devotions: Look for the FRUIT!

2011-07-04T18:03:00.000-05:00

Murphy's Devotions: Look for the FRUIT!: "The fruit of Silence is prayer... The fruit of Prayer is faith... The fruit of Faith is love... The fruit of Love is service... The fruit of..."

Look for the FRUIT!

2011-07-04T17:59:00.001-05:00

The fruit of Silence is prayer...
The fruit of Prayer is faith...
The fruit of Faith is love...
The fruit of Love is service...
The fruit of Service is peace...

— Mother Teresa

Forgiveness

2011-06-18T14:09:00.002-05:00

For a person of faith, forgiveness is much more than a notion, it is imperative. In fact, God calls Christians to forgive others as He has forgiven us. One definition of forgiveness is "not holding the past against someone who is injured you."

Is there someone that you have had difficulty forgiving? One reason it is difficult to forgive is because the injury or wound happened recently and you are still feeling a lot of pain because of it. Another name I've given for such an injury or wound is a "sin debt," meaning an offender has sinned in some way against you and created a "debt" of sorts.

Christians generally feel very rushed to forgive someone who has created a "sin debt" in their lives. What I've seen is that when forgiveness is forced or rushed, it is not as sincere or authentic. Rushed forgiveness is not true forgiveness, it is mainly lip-service. Acknowledging the hurt of the injury or sin debt, is the foundation of authentic forgiveness. When we minimize the wound, our efforts at forgiving the one who hurt us is usually not as thorough.

Is there someone who has injured you recently? Is there someone you know you need to forgive? God wants you to express His grace to others through forgiveness, but you want to make sure that it is the right time, that it is authentic, and that it is complete.

Shirley Sherrod ... Please Don't Misunderstand

2010-07-21T23:46:00.001-05:00

This is beautiful testimony of how God worked in a woman's life to see that our issues are not about racism (black and white) it's about the have's and the have not's.

Thank You

2010-07-05T23:16:00.002-05:00

God's grace alone grants us the blessing of beginning our life together as one. But the blessings have not stopped there. We want to say a very heartfelt "hank you" for the roles each of you have played in our journey's as individuals and in the process of two becoming one. Just as the two of us feel that we are "better together," we have certainly been made "better" by living life with each of you over the years. Thank you!!!

Our parents deserve special thanks not only for putting up with us over the years, but mostly for providing us with a special example of marriage and for passing on a legacy of faithfulness service, and abiding love. May God bless our line by continuing this legacy for generations to come.

This was the marriage sentiments printed on the wedding card for tow friends. It was a beautiful picture of how all the people of their lives impacted them for good. May God be glorified in their marriage.

Amen and amen!

Life Is ...

2010-05-20T12:36:00.001-05:00

Life is an opportunity; benefit from it.

Life is beauty; admire it.

Life is bliss; taste it.

Life is a dream; realize it.

Life is a challenge; meet it.

Life is duty; complete it.

Life is a game; play it.

Life is a promise; fulfill it.

Life is sorrow; overcome it.

Life is a song; sing it …

Mother Teresa

Man's Character; Wife's Countenance

2010-05-10T08:21:00.002-05:00

Someone recently quoted Coach McCartney, "If you want to know a man's character, look into his wife's face, her countenance will reveal it."

This is true for the most part, but she has to have decent character to begin with! If a wife is a control freak or a fear junkie, nothing a husband does will ever be good enough in her eyes.

Murphy

Cool Rap Video - Check it out!

2010-04-26T13:42:00.001-05:00

Now this is awesome in just 1 minute 41 seconds!
View it .. and Pass It On !!

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=WUQYJ77qa50

Hard Times ...

2010-04-14T08:03:00.005-05:00

Question:

In these strained economic times, what weighs most heavily on your mind? What helps you best hang in there?

(Photo by M. Toerner; Texas wildflowers)

Isaiah 49: 15-16

2010-04-13T09:23:00.005-05:00

"I will not forget you.

Behold I have inscribed you

on the palms of My hands."

Question: When you consider what the

Father's heart is like toward you,

what is your response to Him?

Friendships

2010-04-09T10:19:00.004-05:00

What are three qualities you look for in close friendships?

Easter Sunday

2010-04-04T18:34:00.002-05:00

He is risen!!!!!

Fear of Man

2010-04-04T18:22:00.003-05:00

Deuteronomy 1:17

"You shall not show partiality in judgment;

you shall hear the small and the great alike.

You shall not fear man, for the judgment is God's.

The case that is too hard for you,

you shall bring to me and I will hear it."

The Disciples

2010-04-03T08:48:00.002-05:00

Question:

After Jesus gave up His spirit and they actually laid Him in the tomb, what do you think the disciples felt; what did they think about the Man they thought would overthrow the Roman contingent in Jerusalem?

What might you have felt, if you had been one of His disciples?

Good Friday

2010-04-02T17:19:00.001-05:00

What does Good Friday mean to you?

Palm Sunday

2010-03-28T09:43:00.001-05:00

What is most spiritually significant to you about this day?

My Mom

2010-03-27T08:53:00.003-05:00

On February 25th, my mom Betty Geer (from Lake Charles) went to be with the Lord. She died peacefully in the hospital with my sister Karen and my niece Lori at her side.

As only God could orchestrate, my mom prayed to receive Christ on the Saturday before her death on Thursday. (She had prayed before, but the "fruit" of her interactions with family did not reflect her converstion(s).)

One of the greatest ways to honor the death of our parents is to choose to equally and amicably disperse the material things they left behind. I am very thankful for my extended family.

The Real Enemy

2010-02-10T12:29:00.007-06:00

Amazingly some Christians do not believe in the existence of evil or the fallen angel, Lucifer, i.e., Satan. Most Christians don't struggle in accepting the existence of Biblical characters like: Adam and Eve; Saul and David; the prophets; Paul, Peter, and the other apostles. We believe in Bible stories including: Creation, Noah's ark and the flood, Jericho, Passover, the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. So, why do we struggle with the concept of evil, fallen angels, and the Devil. Perhaps, it's because such concentrated evil is inconceivable.

There are several names which describe this evil being:

Satan
Devil
Prince of the power of the air
Ruler of this world
A disguised angel of light
The evil one
The serpent

There are several adjectives which describe him:

Deceiver
Seducer
Liar
Father of all lies
Accuser of the brethren
Enticer

Perhaps we choose not to believe in his existence because we give him too much power in our minds. Perhaps we forget that, "He who is in us is greater than he who is in the world."

Regardless, it is imperative for us to wake up to the schemes of the Evil one. His greatest tactics are: (1) to trick Christians into believing that God is not good; or (2) at the very least, that's God's goodness ebbs and flows depending on His erratic dispositions and our individual performances and short-comings; and (3) that evil does not exist, nor does Satan, himself, exist. All of these are lies!!!!

One of my favorite Murphy-isms is, "God is good, always good, and can never be anything but good." Another one is, "Either God is perfectly good, or He doesn't exist."

It is imperative that we settle who our spiritual enemy is.

How Do You See Him?

2010-02-02T15:45:00.013-06:00

Some people see Him as their heavenly Father. He is the One who allowed His Son to leave heaven and dwell among men. He is the One who benevolently devised the plan of salvation. He allowed Jesus Christ to become the Lamb of God in order to take away the sins of the world. God is the beginning and the end; the Alpha and the Omega. He is good; always good; and can never be anything but good. He loves us perfectly and is Himself perfect love. He longs to bring us back into a right relationship with Himself. (Photo by MToerner; July, 2009)

Some people see Him very differently. To them, He is a distant, impotent deity who doesn’t care about the details of their lives. If He did care, wouldn’t He change their circumstances? Wouldn’t He intervene to relieve their pain? Since He does not intervene, these folks assume that He lives way out in space somewhere. He is neither real nor relevant; neither powerful nor present. These folks believe God to be more harsh than loving; more stern than personal.

How do you see God?

Having a personal experience with God reveals Him to be multifaceted, holy, forgiving, gracious, merciful, and righteous. He is the perfect Father. He is a most desirable Father; the kind of Father we all long for. He is real and relevant; powerful and present. He is always close at hand. He is our ABBA (which means “daddy” in Aramaic.) He promises to never leave nor forsake us. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

How have you experienced Him?

He wants us to see Him and know Him personally and authentically. He is all-knowing, ever-present, and all-powerful. He is right here, right now. He is worthy of our worship, praise, love, and service. He is worthy of our awe, respect, obedience, reverence, and more.

How do you see God?

Is He the, “Man upstairs” to you? Is He a spiritual policeman waiting to hit you with His billet club; or is He a spiritual vending machine in the sky? Is He a stern-faced, mean-spirited Being who scares you into compliance? I hope not.

To get an accurate picture of Him, read through the Psalms and write down the various descriptions of Him. Read the Gospels and observe Jesus. He is the visible expression of the invisible God. Therefore, we can know what the Father is like by observing the behavior of the Son. Observe how Jesus treated His friends and His foes. How did He interact with those caught-up in sin? Did His teaching bring freedom or religious slavery?

How do you see Him?

My Mom's Condition ...

2010-01-31T17:26:00.005-06:00

Dear Friends,

My mom, Betty, has been in the hospital in Lake Charles for about a week and a half. She is to be released tomorrow (Monday) from St. Patrick's. She is going to a facility called the Cove in an effort to rehab her legs and arms.

My mom fell about three weeks ago and subsequently developed excruciating back pain. She was taken to the emergency room and was told that all they could do was give her pain meds to manage the effects of her injuries. During the fall, she sustained three hairline fractures in her back and a compressed disk. We were incensed because the pain medicine would only increase her likelihood of falling again and my mom has severe osteoporosis.

Prior to this event, she has had 24 hour care at her home (my sister, Karen; niece, Lori; cousin, Leslie; nephew, James; have been taking turns staying with her.) I stayed in the hospital last weekend with her and got about 5 hours of sleep.

Another problem arose when my mom started hallucinating and becoming noticeably more demented than her previous baseline symptoms. We were unsure if she had suffered a stroke or had become dehydrated. That's why she went into the hospital most recently.

She was in so much pain in the hospital that when two different aids on two different occasions came to help her move/roll over or sit up to "potty", she was screaming and moaning so much that the aids started crying because of her pain level.

She is being fitted for a back brace. This should help significantly with her back pain. (Please pray that it does so.)

The pain medicine makes her sleep all day and therefore she has lost her appetite. She is barely eating anything. Also, by sleeping all day, she has not used her arms and legs hardly at all. I think through Medicare, she can stay at the Cove for about 28 days (inpatient) to help her regain her strength.

Betty is almost 84. I had a sweet time with her last weekend. Stroking her hair and telling her I love her. She is so weak that she is pretty soft. It was a very kind thing of God to hear my mom say, "I love you too, Murph." I think she actually meant it.

Please pray for Mom, Karen and her family, and me and my family as we go through this process.

Much, much love to you all, m

Pay It Forward

2010-01-11T16:15:00.002-06:00

Have you ever had a friend drive 500 miles to help you convalesce after a medical procedure?

Have you ever had a friend bring an ice chest of food to your house because she knew that after being away for two weeks, there would be no milk, bread, eggs or lunch meat in the refrigerator?

Have you ever had the cashier in a fast-food drive-thru tell you that the driver of the car pulling away donated five dollars toward your meal?

Have you ever had friends give you an intimate birthday dinner party and said you could invite 14-16 special people to share the evening?

Have you ever had folks from church come to your home after hearing about your house fire? Or have you ever had (over a three day period) about 50 people come and help you account for everything in your home that was decimated by a fire; accomplishing in three days what a couple could do in several weeks?

If anyone has ever been sweet or kind or thoughtful to you, try today to "pay it forward."

Intentions

2010-01-06T11:30:00.005-06:00

In chapter 2 of the Gospel of Mark, Jesus and his disciples were walking along in a wheat field. The disciples were hungry and thought nothing of picking the heads of grain and eating them. Their perception was (1) we are on a road trip with the Master; (2) we are hungry and need a little snack; (3) God provided this beautiful wheat field with harvest-ready wheat; and so, (4) we can eat some grain now and it will tide us over until we are able to get a proper meal.

Sounds pretty innocuous, doesn't it? Oh, by the way, did I tell you this event took place on the Sabbath.

Some Pharisees, noted for being lovers and keepers of the Law, observed the disciples snacking. The Pharisees were offended and indignant. Picking the heads of wheat and eating the grain was considered work and good, religious people don't work on the Sabbath. The Sabbath was regarded as a holy day and a day of rest.

In your opinion, what were the intentions of the disciples? What were the intentions of the Pharisees?

What is more important: keeping the letter of the Law or the intent of the Law?

Can someone keep almost all of the Law and still be far away from God? Can someone look unworthy and undeserving and be close to God?

I'd love to hear your thoughts ...

Tell The Truth...

2009-12-10T10:45:00.007-06:00

A friend was struggling with:

comparing (she doesn't have a lot of what others have)
potential poverty
spending emotional energy getting healthier

1. Any effort you put into fixing your life is never, never, never wasted. Real growth can not be taken away. It may not be walked out consistently, but it still present.

You are the daughter of a King. No matter how much money you have or don't have, you are richer than most of the people you know. You are committed to getting healthier (emotionally, socially, psychologically, physically, and spiritually). You genuinely love your family and friends.

2. Some people are better at acquiring stuff. But stuff can't buy love, happiness, peace, or eternal life. Yes, it is easier for some people to acquire things, but they don't have the quality of life you do.

Plus, things acquired by ill-gotten-gain are ultimately tainted and tarnished. The way some people get stuff is outright sinful and hurtful.

Do you ever struggle with comparing, fear of poverty, or concern that getting healthier is just a waste of energy?

Take a moment to tell yourself the truth from a Godly perspective.

The Evil We Commit

2009-12-01T13:01:00.003-06:00

Jeremiah 2:13 -

"For My people have committed two evils:

They have forsaken Me,

The fountain of living waters,

To hew for themselves cisterns,

Broken cisterns

That can hold no water."

When you read this verse, what is the first thing that comes to mind?

Do you feel accused or exposed?

Do you feel appealed to?

Do you feel regret, remorse or discomfort?

Do you feel energized to live to God?

A Way to Live

2009-11-14T13:53:00.002-06:00

LIVE simply,

LOVE generously,

SERVE faithfully,

SPEAK truthfully,

PRAY DAILY,

Then, leave Everything else to GOD.

He's Here

2009-11-14T13:44:00.005-06:00

Vocatus atque non vocatus deus aderit

"Bidden or not bidden, God is present."

(Eminent psychologist Carl Jung had these words carved over the front door of his house in Zurich; they are also on his tombstone.)

Veteran's Day

2009-11-11T12:32:00.001-06:00

Today, we pay tribute to all who defend and protect our country from various enemies both foreign or domestic. Since our country's inception, men and women willingly put their lives on the line to protect our God-given freedom. They knowingly put themselves in harms way accomplish that mission. Their ultimate sacrifice is losing their lives in the process.

It is a noble thing to serve in our armed forces and all Americans need to consider the debt we owe to every man and woman who has done so.

When thinking of someone's willingness to give his or her life for our greater good, my thoughts quickly turn to Jesus. He willingly gave his life as a sacrifice for us. God, the Father, did not want any to perish. He wanted and continues to want all to have eternal life. They must choose. We all must choose.

The God we worship is persistent. I think God is the supreme example of the above quote. He will never, never, never give up. If you have come to faith in God, through Jesus Christ, He will never give up on His forgiveness, mercy, and grace. Never! If you have not yet been adopted into God's forever family, He will call your name every day until the day you die.

Thank God for all that He has done in your life.

Thank Him for His future plans for you.

Thank Him for your spiritual transformation.

The Deadliest Catch

2009-11-10T07:27:00.001-06:00

Have you ever watched, "The Deadliest Catch?" It is an amazing show that captures the dangers, hardships and oppressive weather crab fishermen endure out on the Bering Sea.

On one episode, one of the fishing vessels headed for a small, uninhabited harbor tucked behind a mountainous landscape. They were attempting to shield themselves from a winter storm. They dropped the anchor in an effort to maintain their position and not be pulled out to sea, out of the harbor by the strong currents.

The size of the anchor was huge. It weighed so much that it was fastened to a thick wire cable and it was raised and lowered by mechanized pulley. The size of the anchor amazed me. The sight of it and the way it was able to hold a sizable ship in place gave me a whole new mental picture of the importance of God being the spiritual anchor for Christians.

In the New Testament, Jesus was an anchor of sorts to the men and women who believed in Him and put their faith in Him. He was an anchor that never let them down. He always kept His word. He always told the truth. He was candid about the suffering that all believers incur. He was equally candid about the hope we have concerning our future being settled when we die. He clearly stated that if we believe in Him, we will receive eternal life.

Is Jesus your anchor? Or has something or someone taken His place? Our connection to Him, once it is established, is permanent; but we don't always tend to that connection. We don't always remember that relating to Him every day ... all throughout the day ... helps us stay steady and steadfast. Our connection enhances His ability to be that immovable anchor in our lives. If you don't feel as connected as you once did, what is one thing you can do to refocus on Him?

Successfully Launching Our Children

2009-10-26T23:33:00.007-05:00

Last Thursday evening, our son Cal proposed to Miss Sara O. Povlish. Cal and Sara met each other in a Border's Bookstore in San Antonio, Texas on September 20, 2008. They became the best of friends and are looking forward to spending their lives together.

The cool thing about Cal's proposal was Mike and I were able to witness the whole event. After all those years of Junior/Senior Proms and high school homecomings, we got to see our son propose to the woman he adores. We even have pictures!!!!

The next day was equally important. Cal graduated from Navigator Training and got his "wings." This means he is a rated officer in the United States Air Force. His new fiance, Sara, pinned his wings on his uniform. It was a wonderful event in Cal and Sara's life together and it was a huge accomplishment for them both.

It is a joyful thing to see our children grow up. It is super rewarding to see them launch successfully.

If you are a young parent, it may feel as though the launching stage may never come, but it will arrive. Try to think of the most important things you want to pass on to your children and work really hard in achieving these goals. The time you have with them will pass by ever so quickly. You turn around and the time is gone. No kidding. So, think long and hard about what God's goals for your child are and work with your child to achieve those goals.

I hope that the launching of your child(ren) will be as rewarding as this has been for us.

Blessings, Murphy

A Spiritual Business Plan

2009-10-12T08:48:00.002-05:00

Recently someone asked me to share my business plan with them.

Murphy Toerner and Associates, Inc. has grown into a wonderfully effective and multi-faceted Christian counseling center. We currently have 8 counselors serving in two locations (Baton Rouge and Hammond, La.). In the near future, we plan to add another male counselor at the Baton Rouge location and another female counselor at the Hammond location.

When the request was posed to me, I almost chuckled because I know that my business plan consists of asking the Father what He wants me to do and then doing it. I know this is not considered "good business practice," but for my simple approach to running MTA it has been very effective.

Since my years on Young Life staff, God has proven that if He wants me to be "up front," I don't have to scratch or claw to work my way into being "up front." He showed me that whatever was supposed to happen, He would do the work. All I had to do was wait, listen, and obey.

How well do you wait on the Lord?

How well do you listen to Him?

How well do you obey Him once He has directed you?

Pay attention this week to these qualities. Take note of how you're doing in each area. Then, make an adjustment if you need to.

Trauma

2009-09-08T18:39:00.002-05:00

I want you to know that if you have been hurt, abused or traumatized, God understands that it will take longer for you to trust Him. He is not mad at you. He is not in any hurry. He knows that you were more controlled than loved; you were more manipulated than cherished. He is aware that you were “used” by one or more adults in your life and then you were thrown away. You were discarded. (I want you to know that I am very sorry for every way you were hurt.)

God is perfectly patient with all of us, especially those of us who have been hurt, abused and traumatized. He knows that we have been damaged. God is like no one we have ever known before. His love is different. He is committed to pursuing us. He has all the time in the world and we are supremely important to Him. He will love us … and love us … and love us some more until we believe (trust, have faith) that He is real and His love for us is real. At some point, most of us will respond to Him and to His unadulterated love. How could we resist the greatest Lover of our souls? In time, as His love unwaveringly continues, we will fall in love with Him. We will love Him with a love that we had not thought possible for our wounded hearts.

Uncommon Graces - by John Vawter

2009-09-02T09:26:00.002-05:00

A list of uncommon graces:

GENTLENESS
ATTENTIVENESS
LOYALTY
CANDOR
MERCY
KINDNESS
REPENTANCE

Take a moment and review each of these Christ-like graces which are rarely demonstrated in today's culture.

How would you rank your ability and consistency of demonstrating these graces to others in your everyday life? Use a scale of 1-10 (where 10 represents "outstanding")

What were the results?

How do you feel about your findings?

Ask God what He wants you to do, via His help, to grow in each of these Christ-like qualities.

Uncommon Graces - by John Vawter

2009-09-02T09:11:00.004-05:00

Taken from the foreword -- written by Dr. Leith Anderson(p.8)

...(T)he number one reason for Christians to live Christianly is Christ. Our motivations to do good is to please Jesus and be like Jesus. But there is a second powerful motivation -- seeing the impact of our grace in the lives of others.

Victor Hugo's classic Les Miserables keeps coming back to the public in stage musicals and screen movies. It is the story of a convict who is treated kindly by a French bishop who gives him a place to stay in the bishop's home. In return for generous hospitality, the convict steals the bishop's silver. He is arrested by the police who have the man, the stolen goods, and every intent of sending him back to prison and hard labor. However, the bishop insists that the silver is a gift and the man is set free. The impact of the bishop's uncommon grace is so profound that the convict's life is transformed. Unexpected love, forgiveness, and generosity change him from a hardened criminal into a respectable civil leader whose entire life is marked by kindness to others. He, too, becomes a man of uncommon graces.

Imagine if we were all like that bishop returning good for evil, love for hate, generosity for greed, and hope for hopelessness. We would be more than like the bishop; we would be just like Jesus!

In Uncommon Graces, John Vawter has candidly and compassionately tackled the topic and the tension. He is no "do-good wimp" who blindly allows others to take unfair advantage of him. He is no 'hardened legalist" who knows the law but forgets the grace. John realistically understands our complex human nature and calls us to live uncommonly and graciously as Christians who represent Jesus and transform others.

Parent Job Description

2009-08-27T14:19:00.001-05:00

This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way,
I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!!

POSITION :
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop

JOB DESCRIPTION :

Long term, team p layers needed, for challenging,
permanent work in an
often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication
and organizational skills and be willing to work
variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends
and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
Some overnight travel required, including trips to
primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!
Travel expenses not reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES :

The rest of your life.
Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily,
until someone needs $5.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
Also, must possess the physical stamina of a
pack mule
and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat
in case, this time, the screams from
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges,
such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets
and stuck zippers.
Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and
coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings
for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be willing to be indispensable one minute,
an embarrassment the next..
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a
half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final, complete accountability for
the quality of the end product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :

None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills,
so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :

None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION :

Get this! You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because
of the assumption that college will help them
become financially independent.
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS :

While no health or dental insurance, no pension,
no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and
no stock options are offered;
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love,
and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

Forward this on to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis,
letting them know they are appreciated
for the fabulous job they do...
or forward with love
to anyone thinking of applying for the job.

A Different Light

2009-08-20T12:57:00.005-05:00

In our marriage, Mike and I had a tumultuous beginning. We were older when we got married and we were quite unaware of the personal baggage we brought into our marriage. In spite of a rough few years, we "made it," meaning we've been married since 1981!!!

Learning to deal with our expectations was key to our marital success. Mike and I had very specific expectations of what the other person should be like or how they should treat us. We had expectations about what married life needed to look like and there were many other expectations.

God was most gracious when he gave me a word picture that helped me "see" Mike's limitations; see Mike's humanity. Prior to this time, I was upset with Mike because I thought, "You're a grown man, you're smart, you're successful, why is it so hard for you to love me in the ways I think I need or deserve to be loved? Why is it so hard for you to remember _____?"

Here's what the Father did for me. He showed me that even though Mike and I were adults when we married, in some ways we were still wounded little kids. Significant people in our lives had created "holes" in our lives. "Holes" are created when legitimate childhood needs are not adequately met or not met at all. Siblings, parents, teachers, coaches, fellow students, friends, and others did not love us in ways we needed. I'm not blaming them because most people are doing their best with what they have at a given moment. This is not about placing blame on anyone; it is about legitimate childhood needs going unmet.

Unmet needs tend to create expectations and they set the tone for how we manage life. Unmet needs cause us to be more driven and determined than others. Unmet needs are usually the main culprits in developing our adult addictions. We are running after stuff in hopes of filling a specific "hole."

The word picture God gave me was seeing Mike, as an adult, lying in a hospital bed with an oxygen tent over his head and torso. He was unconscious and so when I entered the room of my visualization, Mike did not get up and joyfully greet me. He couldn't because his "condition." He was not avoiding meeting my expectations; he was in an unconscious state. The fact that he was an "adult" did not matter in the least because the truth was he could not act or perform in the way(s) I was demanding. He couldn't. He just couldn't.

When God showed me that Mike's failure to treat me in ways that I demanded was not a personal rejection of me on his part. He could not be there for me because there was something more devastating going on in his life.

For whatever reason, this visual image totally changed my perspective. I was able to adjust my expectations. I was able to accept where Mike was because "he could not be where he wasn't."

Is there a person in your life that God wants you to "see" them in a different light? God can give you insight and a heavenly perspective concerning some of the people in your life who are most hurtful or disappointing. Just ask the Father to show you.

Wisdom of Years Gone Bye

2009-08-20T12:54:00.001-05:00

Our Deepest Fear

2009-08-11T22:29:00.003-05:00

Our Deepest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?"

Actually, who are you not to be?

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

(Quote taken from the movie "Akeela and the Bee" - 2007)

Human nature is interesting, isn't it? All of us are designed by God to want to "win" the race; and yet, so often we are too anxious to enter the contest. Why is this the case? What are we so afraid of?

Our insecurities act like invisible thieves who masterfully steal God-ordained opportunities, which are designed to showcase the glory of God as He manifests Himself through us. If you listen closely (in your imagination), you can almost hear the Father say, "Go for it!!! You and I can do it together. Don't be afraid." It is as though God is cheering us on to try new things; brave new worlds; and go for the gold medals of life. We linger and hang back ...

What is up with this?

In God's economy, everything is a "win - win" situation. If you enter the race and try your best, you may actually win the contest, receive the gold medal, and hear the heavenly "national anthem" played as you stand on the winner's stand. But, ... what if you lose the race, what then? Well, from God's economy, it can still be a "win" situation, if you will only see it from a heavenly perspective.

Winning is not limited to "crossing the finish line" first. We "win" every time we:

overcome our anxiety to enter the contest
train hard and prepare well
overcome adversity
maintain a positive mental attitude
are resilient after a defeat
help a brother or sister win his / her individual race
don't quit
don't fail on purpose (believe it or not, some people do struggle with this one)

The concept of "winning" and subsequently feeling good about yourself comes from God. Read the story of creation in Genesis. Every time God created something, He stepped back, looked at His accomplishment, and saw that it was good. Every time we try our best, overcome our fears, assuage our performance anxiety ... we win. And it feels really, really, really good.

Don't be afraid to enter the various contests of life. Ask the Lord to help you press through the things that strike fear in your heart. Jesus overcame His fears by drawing strength from His Father in heaven. We can do the same, through the power of His indwelling Spirit.

Go and manifest the glory of God that is within you.

By doing so you will be giving others permission to do the same.

May this encourage you deeply in your inner-person.

murphy

The Nature of the Journey: What Movement Toward God Looks Like

2009-08-11T22:20:00.001-05:00

"Christ-following involves daring to float on the dark river of unseeing that leads to the Kingdom of Light." It requires the courage to set out on a path that is not only narrow, but also far from straight. That is why it is a journey of faith.

"The essence of Christian spirituality is to follow Christ on a pilgrimage that will often leave us feeling we are lost in the desert or heading in the wrong direction away from everything known and safe."

"The distant land is the new creature into whom Christ wishes to fashion us -- the whole and holy person who finds his/her uniqueness, identity, and calling in Christ. The distant land is God and the true self we are fully found in God."

"... there is a divine pattern at work which allows the widest variety for each Christian's idiosyncrasies, but seeks through the Holy Spirit to bring us toward union with God through spiritual encounters and experiences common to us all."

Our "union with God necessitates":

Desire for holiness

Accept Suffering

Relationship is the Essence of Reality

Eternal Perspective

A Desire for Holiness -- a deep desire to overcome sin and experience biblical holiness. Isaiah -- "The blinding glimpse of God's burning holiness educes the obligation and desire for holiness to become part of his own soul. He is compounded of but one desire, that the burning holiness of God would sear the sin out of his innermost being. Symbolically it is done. A live coal touches his lips, and his sin is purged."

John Stott -- "One of the God-appointed functions of the Holy Spirit is to make us know, feel, mourn, loathe, and forsake out sins."

To get a sense of "holiness" -- "gaze steadily at Jesus Christ and consult one's heart and mind at the reaction one feels. He is pure, adorable, holy. Gaze at Jesus! Adoring contemplation of the Savior. Look at Jesus ... looking in loe and longing on Jesus. Holiness is a by-product of this. They grew in holiness as they grew in the steadiness and fixity of their gazing."

"Throughout church history all the saints are of one mind on this issue -- because God is holy, we must be holy too."

Accept Suffering -- Dennis Covington - "Mystery is not the absence of meaning, but the presence of more meaning than we can comprehend."

"Both biblical teaching and personal experience combine to show us that God uses suffering to bring us to holiness and maturity. (mental, emotional, and physical suffering) ... Character, love, and pompassion develop through suffering."

Hebrews 2:10 (NIV) - "being made 'perfect through suffering.' "

"Suffering is not a very popular doctrine amongst modern-day believers. But have you noticed? There is always an indefinable something about people who have suffered. They have a fragrance around them that reminds one of the meekness and gentleness of Christ."

John Stott -- "I sometimes wonder if the real test of our hunger for holiness is our willingness to experience any degree of suffering if only thereby God will make us holy."

Relationship is the Essence of Reality -- God places great importance on interpersonal relationships. Relationships are frought with difficulties; ... minor jealousies; ... pettiness; ... belitttling ...

One can read biographies ... "that talk about ... difficulties with relationships and how they sought to overcome them. And many of them tell how even though they may have inherited a difficult and passionate temperament, they allowed grace to work in their lives until they soared above such things as pettiness, temper, and lack of consideration toward others."

What is the divine purpose behind relationships? ... to enable us to understand the essence of reality.

Quote -- The Everlasting God -- "... we learn from the Trinity that relationship is the essence of reality and therefore the essence of our existence, and we also learn that the way this relationship should be expressed is by 'concern for others.' Within the Trinity itself is a concern by the persons of the Trinity for one another."

"I used to believe that truth is the essence of reality (then, I made a paradigm shift) ... I came to see ... that the energy which pulses at the heart of the Trinity is other-centered. Each member of the Trinity is more concerned about the others than He is about Himself. Part of the movement toward God, i am convinced, is learning to relate to others in the way the Trinity related to one another -- in true other-centeredness."

Often we regard people "as the cause of many of our problems until I read ... 'Relationships do not so much cause problems as reveal problems.'" (My reaction to people was the real problem.)

"To be thoroughly honest, the greatest challenge of my life has been to consider others as more important than myself."

"Dr. E. Stanley Jones defines Christianity as 'the science of relating well to others in the spirit of Jesus Christ.' He added, ' ... we are as mature as our relationships.' " (Unless we learn to relate to others in other-centeredness, our union with God will be blocked.)

Eternal Perspective -- All great saints see life in the light of eternity. The great and the godly seem always to be able to keep heaven in view. ( ... the silly little honors ... or the material things that many love and crave are seen as unimportant.)

"With a mind set on the glory of God and a heart aflame with supernatural love, ... (they know ... they know that earth is not their home.)"

"Heaven is our home; it is where we belong. It is a theme that must be kept in constant focus ... 'we are to be God-intoxicated men who always have heaven in view.' "

"The happiest people on earth ... are those who keep their eyes focused on heaven. The Psalmist wrote, 'In thy presence is fullness of joy. In thy right hand are pleasures forevermore' (Psalm 16:11, NASB).

Joy is found in the realization of heaven.

Joy is also found in the anticipation of heaven.

by David G. Benner Conversations Magazine, Vol. 2:2, Fall-2004

(Murphy Toerner -- this article was just one of many wonderful, challenging articles found in a relatively new periodical "Conversations". The senior editor is Larry Crabb. If you are interested in knowing more about this new magazine, please contact me at 753-7773 and I will be glad to give you the information.)

Spiritual Practices

2009-08-11T22:11:00.002-05:00

The purpose of spiritual practices is NOT to earn more grace or love or mercy or forgiveness or power or more eternal life. The truth is, once we become believers in Jesus Christ, we have gained a heavenly inheritance which is complete and can not be added to by human means. To think that we can add anything or earn anything in addition to what Jesus Christ gained for us through His death, burial, and resurrection is unthinkable.

However, to believe that there is no way for us to enhance our connection to and experience of God, the Father; of Jesus Christ, the Son; and of the indwelling Holy Spirit in our day to day relationships with them … our daily walk as practicing Christians, is inconceivable. Throughout the history of the faith, the spiritual fathers and spiritual mothers of our faith discovered that spiritual practices (disciplines) were not only invaluable to “spiritual formation” but essential. Often these spiritual forefathers and foremothers suffered greatly because the intimacy that they gained via spiritual practices produced a visibly unique level of intimacy with God. This level of intimacy was uncommon and consequently many of the saints who practiced spiritual exercises were often jailed, burned, tortured, and caste out of the church as heretics. Anytime a Christian attained some sort of special connection with God, they were suspected of heresy.

Spiritual formation, also known as Christian maturity, is the ultimate goal for every Christian. Freely accepting the gift of salvation from God through Jesus Christ is just the initial part of our journey toward Him and maturity in Him (and we accept this free gift via God’s grace.) The major part of the journey is concerned with our connection with God. It must be deep and personal. It must be consistent…day in and day out so God will be glorified in our lives. (To me, glorified means that His life is increasingly and consistently expressed through each of us who belong to Him and His forever family.)

There are many spiritual practices. A few are:

· bible study

· meditation on scripture

· solitude and silence

· fasting

· scripture memory

· simplicity

· worship

· praise and singing

· prayer

The only way to approach God is with reverence and humility and meekness of heart. The bible is clear that “fear” of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. A.W. Tozier, in Knowledge of the Holy, says that the way a culture views God is strategic. The spiritual practices are aimed at posturing us before the Holy Spirit so that He can work within us. His goal is to renew our minds, change our hearts and inner thoughts and attitudes, increase the presence and quality of His fruit (the Fruit of the Spirit) in our lives and make us more like Jesus (conform us to the image of Christ.) [Think how much sin we get into on a daily basis or how much sin we casually tolerate because we have a “low view” of God or we lack a deep respect for who He is and what He is capable of.]

Blessings to you.

murphy toerner

Hide and Seek

2009-08-10T12:15:00.001-05:00

I grew up in Lake Charles, Louisiana. We were the first house on our block, but as time passed, other families came to reside there. As the number of kids grew in size, we played together and hung out together. We built Christmas tree forts, played softball and football, and we also played "hide & seek."

I loved this game. Some of my favorite places to hide were: the acres of woods behind our houses. If we were playing inside "hide & seek," I'd hide in the hall bathroom (in the dirty clothes hamper ... when it was empty of course or under the long built-in vanity). I also hid in my bedroom (behind the door or inside the huge closet).

Both of my sons loved playing hide & seek. When my husband walked down the hallway toward their bedroom, I'd throw a sheet over the boys and pretend I did not know where they were when my husband walked into the room. Of course, Mike would play along and say, "Dorable, have you seen the boys?" At which time, the boys would giggle and scream with glee.

Most people think that the goal of "hide & seek" is to hide so well that you will never be found; but this isn't the case. The real goal of the game is to hide well enough to make the game fun, but not so well that you are never found. The fun really comes in the near misses. It's when you are just about to be found and you dart from your hiding place and make it back to base before the person playing "IT" can catch you.

How do I know this? Because if it takes, what we consider too long to be found, we'll actually start to give our position away. We'll say, "I'm in hhheeeerrrrreeeee!" or "You're getting warmer (or colder)."

No one likes playing a game and never being found. We'll give up and quit the game if it takes an inordinate amount of time for "IT" to find us.

As silly as it sounds, some of us still play "hide & seek" as adults. Instead of hiding from "IT," we hide from God and the people around us. We'll even hide from ourselves. I think we hide from God because we are fearful that He is angry with us, disappointed in us, or that He is going to require something from us that would be painful to fulfill. We hide from others because we are ashamed and feel inferior. We wear "masks" so they can't see who we really are because what if they were to see us and not like us ... so we hide. We hide from ourselves because we don't accept parts of who we are.

You know, we started the whole hiding from God thing in the Garden of Eden. When Adam and Eve sinned, they realized they were naked and in their shame, hid from God. Interestingly, we still do the same.

It is sad that we hide from the very Person who loves us so much. God is the only Person who knows us and loves us perfectly. He is the only Person who accepts us and understands us completely. He is the only Person who utterly values us and cherishes us.

Don't let Satan confuse you. God is the safest Person on Earth (and in the Heavens). Don't hide from God. Don't run from God. He is not the bad guy. He is not going to force you to go to some remote place to share the Gospel. If God wants you to do something, He will give you or create within you the desire to do what He is calling you to do. God doesn't use "force." He uses love and kindness; gentleness and compassion.

You don't have to hide from God. You don't have to be afraid of Him. He is the good Shepherd. He is the Perfect Father. He is our loving Bridegroom. He is our divine Power Source.

Don't hide. But if you do, stop and ask why you feel you need to hide. God will show you your misbeliefs.

Cal & Sara Easter-2009

2009-07-29T17:28:00.003-05:00

Being Remembered

2009-07-12T17:48:00.004-05:00

Photo by M Toerner; June, 2008; Rome, Italy
This is a statue in the Piazza Navona. A piazza is a large open area like an open square. This one had two big fountains. The two figures in the photograph represent two architects. The story goes that two architects were working on the same building. They were jealous and envious of each other and they wanted to discredit one another.
The figure in the fore-ground, whose head is covered by a cloth, represents the disdain and disgust its creator had for the other artist. The man's covered head represents the unwillingness of this artist to even gaze upon the other man's "lesser work." To make the point, this figure's entire head is covered and therefore, blinded. He can not look at the work of the other artist.
The figure in the background, with his hand held up as though is he protecting himself, was created by to other architect. The figure is portraying the idea that the first architect's work is so shabby that the building is about to fall down. It is conveying the workmanship is not trustworthy and he must protect himself.
Can you believe these guys? They created and carved two statues which reveal the hardness and petty jealousy of their hearts. On top of that, they have existed for centuries. Jealousy and callousness are not sources of productive inspiration.
How sad! I wonder how they felt 10 years or 20 years after the completion of these two statues? I wonder if they ever came to regret their petty, immature judgments? As it is, the two architects are remembered more for their foolishness than the quality of their work. They are more remembered for the "in your face" contempt for one another. What a regrettable lasting legacy.
Do you have any "statues" in your heart which communicate your hardness of heart; your unforgiveness; you envy, distrust, and disrespect? Do you want to be remembered for these things?
Instead, be remembered for the quality and consistency of your Christ-like character, your: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and your self-control.
Praying for you today, Murphy

The Illusion of Control

2009-07-12T17:43:00.001-05:00

Do you try to control situations and people in your life? Do you try to control your children, boyfriend/girlfriend, or your spouse? Do you use control as a means to gaining a sense of security?

A lot of people go through life trying to control circumstances and people, but the thought of successfully controlling anyone or anything is an illusion. When you really think about it, there is no such thing as control.

Somewhere along the way Christians embraced the idea that if their children looked perfect, acted perfect, and achieved a lot, then the parents proved they were good Christians. (Our children's performances don't prove anything. Anyone can "look good" on the outside, and yet, their hearts are far from God.

How do we control our children? We use threats, manipulation, and other things to get them to do what we want. How do we try to control our spouses? Again, we use threats, rejection, shame, criticism, withdrawal, or contempt. We say all sorts of things. We will even throw out the "D-word" (divorce) every now and then just to scare them into doing what we want.

We often attempt to control our sense of well-being and security by performing perfectly or having a huge groups of tennis buddies and Bible study friends. We think if we have enough money and resources we'll insulate ourselves from hardships and disappointments. If we can be the president of this organization or a leader of that committee, we will gain the status we seek. If we live in the most popular or pricey neighborhood, we believe people will respect us or look up to us.

All of these are aimed at gaining some sort of control over situations or people. Sadly, the idea of successfully controlling anyone or anything is truly an illusion. It can't be done. If you believe you can control people or situations, think again. In fact, you'd better rethink your entire approach to life because all of your effort to control will fail. You will continue to try, however, because you've bought into the illusion of control.

Think about it. Can you really make an 18 year old son or daughter consistently clean their room? Can you make your middle schooler make all A's and B's on their report card? Can you force your spouse to be on time? Can you make a spouse change their value system? Even if you threaten divorce, will that make your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend stop doing a specific annoying behavior? Can you control events? Can you make more good ones happen; and less bad ones? Can you guarantee financial security? Can you be certain that your house will never burn down or you'll never get into another car accident?

We can not control life, circumstances, events, or people. Truthfully, we can barely control ourselves at times. Thinking we can control anything is just an illusion promoted by our enemy.

Interestingly enough, God understands the illusion of control. He never tries to control us. If He wanted to control us, He could. All He'd have to do is turn off the air in the atmosphere for about 30 seconds. That would surely get our attention and our complete, albeit coerced, obedience. But God does not do that. He understands the illusion of control.

Are you currently trying to control someone or something. If so, please stop! It is an exercise in futility. Instead, turn to God; trust in God; rely on Him. Nothing can touch your life that hasn't passed through the loving hands of your Father in heaven.

FRIENDS...

2009-06-29T23:06:00.002-05:00

Friends are very special people who accept each other with a unconditional caring.

They recognize each other's talents and faults and acknowledge them without judgment.

They are incapable of turning away when times are tough and life's problems seem hard to bear.

Instead, they encourage each other so they can enjoy the good times and find strength to endure the bad times.

They're never afraid to say what they feel and can be honest without causing hurt or pain.

They can depend on each other because they have the kind of trust that allows them to share the best and worst of their lives with laughter and without fear.

May you be this kind of friend...

By Andrea L. Hines - Blue Mountain Arts

Lord, I Surrender

2009-06-29T22:37:00.002-05:00

Lord, I surrender all that I am and all that I possess to You today.

I fully understand and am very thankful for all that You have blessed me with.

I know that with Your blessings comes responsibilities.

I ask that You forgive me when I look to other people or material items for happiness and fulfillment.

I know You are my source. I know You are my strength. I know You are my everything.

You define the quality of my life.

I give my life back to You today, fully surrendered and fully devoted to Your cause.

I love You and thank You for being Lord of my life.

Amen

Differentiation

2009-06-29T00:56:00.002-05:00

“Differentiation permits you to maintain your own course when friends and family pressure you to agree and conform. Well-differentiated people can agree without feeling like they’re ‘losing themselves’ and can disagree without feeling alienated and embittered. They can stay connected with people who disagree with them and still ‘know who they are’. They don’t have to leave the situation to hold onto their sense of self.” (p.56)

“Differentiation is the ability to stay in connection without being consumed by the other person. Our urge for togetherness and our capacity to care always drive us to seek connection but true interdependence requires emotionally distinct people.” (p. 57)

“Emotional fusion is the opposite of differentiation.”(p.57)

“Emotional fusion is connection without separation… Emotional fusion is a tenacious emotional link between people that allows anxiety to flow between them. It arises as the consequence of incomplete emotional development, wherein each partner relies on the other to support and supplant is or her functioning. (“Few of us are highly developed when we marry-marriage itself makes us grow up. To the degree that you are not a well-developed human, you will be emotionally fused with the people around you.” p. 295) I’m not referring to some kind of unconscious feeling, but rather a tangible process by which people pass anxiety between them.” (p. 116)

“Lack of differentiation alienates us from those we love. Emotional fusion deceives us into thinking that we’re not connected and we move away in defense. But the deeper truth is that we have to move away to counterbalance the tremendous impact we feel our spouse has on us. Or, unable to turn away, we turn ourselves over to the connection, but it feels engulfing.” (p. 57)

“Differentiation is the ability to maintain your sense of self when your partner is away or when you are not in a primary love relationship.” (p. 67).

“The differentiated self is solid but permeable, allowing you to remain close even when your partner tries to mold or manipulate you.” (p. 67).

“Differentiation doesn’t involve any lack of feelings or emotions. You can connect with your partner without fear of being swept up in his or her emotions. You can evaluate your emotions (and your partner’s) both subjectively and objectively. You have feelings, but they don’t control you or define your sense of self.” (p. 68).

“…we emerge from our family of origin at about the highest level of differentiation our parents achieved. Our basic level of differentiation is pretty much established by adolescence and can remain at that level for life. In the process of regulating their own emotions, poorly differentiated parents pressure their children for togetherness or distance, which stops children from developing their ability to think, feel, and act for themselves. They learn to conduct themselves only in reaction to others.” (p. 69).

“By now the paradoxes of differentiation should be clear: while differentiation allows us to set ourselves apart from others and determines how far apart we sit, it also opens the space for true togetherness. It’s about getting closer and more distinct-rather than more distant. “ (p. 74).

Excerpts compiled by Anne Hays from Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch, Ph.D.

Five Traumas

2009-06-16T15:18:00.004-05:00

Dr. Terry Wardle, Ashland Theological Seminary, has described five types of trauma:

Type A - not getting what a child (legitimately) needs in the early developmental stages of life.
Comes in the form of withholding -- touch, love, safety, positive affirmations. Impacts how a
child sees the world around them.

Type B - getting what a child does not need in the early developmental stages of life. Comes in
the form of punishment, abuse (sexual, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual), criticism, etc.
Impacts how a child sees himself or herself.

Type C - event trauma This happens in our environment -- accidents, natural disasters

Type D - betrayal trauma When someone betrays a sacred trust. It is a betrayal because of a power differential or age differential. One person holds significant influence over another. Examples: coach, teacher, parent, step-parent, member of extended family, and/or older sibling.

Type E - sustained duress This is the "water torture" of trauma. The exposure is persistent and pervasive and causes the person to "wear" the trauma. (You're stupid!) Constant message that you are less than others around you.

Look at each of these carefully.

Do you recognize any of them (or all of them) being present in your life?

How has trauma impacted you?

Have you sought help or are you trying to hanging there and let it dissipate on its own?

Is there anything the Lord wants you to do right now?

Living in Community

2009-06-15T13:44:00.006-05:00

Life on earth is treacherous. No one escapes injury. No one!

From most vantage points, Earth looks like a beautiful place. No one suspects the degrees of darkness and danger inherently present. Originally, Earth was created to be a garden. Since the Fall of Man, it's been relegated to hell on earth. Satan and his minions, the evil ways and philosophies of the world, and the indwelling principle of flesh wreak havoc. From our first breath to our last, we undergo intense, intentional, and continual assaults on our persons and our environment.

Most often, we are hurt by those closest to us. The culprits of our demise include our: mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers (other extended family members), friends, co-workers, and/or bosses. The proximity of close relationships and the frequency of interactions insure multiple opportunities for injurious exchanges. When injured, our responses include: concealing, denying, minimizing, rationalizing, intellectualizing, or excusing the injury. If multiple injuries are sustained, most of us will isolate in an effort to protect ourselves from further harm. The bad thing about isolation is it leads to eccentricity. In the case of a life-time of on-going injuries, our perspective about life, God, people, ourselves, safety, risk, reality and truth is thoroughly affected.

Although we are HURT in community; our greatest chance to HEAL is in community. Healing takes place when there are people in our lives who care and love us extravagantly. We heal when someone has the courage to look at our dark junk, sit in it with us, and refuse to run away or abandon us. We heal when we are loved with the love of Jesus Christ as He manifests Himself through brothers and sisters in Christ.

What is your "community" like? Do you have one? Do you have one person in your life who will walk with you as you journey toward God? Are you a safe person for those around you? These are important questions. Take some time to ponder them. Ask the Lord for direction on how to be a vibrant part of a Godly community.

Blessings,

Murphy

Your First Date

2009-05-28T13:03:00.004-05:00

Do you remember your first date?

My first date took place while I was in 7th grade. He guy rode his bike to the school dance and my father dropped me off. I wore an emerald green dress that was satin. I was scared and nervous. Throughout the evening, we danced and laughed and danced some more. We had a great time.

Think about it. We had a great time! Yet, there was no expensive dinner or limousine. There were no party pics and there was no "good night (I don't know what I'm doing) kiss." Yet, it was a lot of fun.

What made the evening so good? Primarily it was because I felt special, beautiful, and chosen.

Every woman longs to be: noticed, pursued, and appreciated. Every woman desires to be chosen and SPECIAL. Every woman needs to know she is valued and attractive. Every woman wants to have a sense of hope for the future. Women want healthy relationships and healthy intimacy.

There are tons of life-lessons and messages we learn along the way. Often, we learn messages like: you are ordinary; you are common. Sometimes we receive messages that define us like: you are expendable and disposable. This kind of treatment, or shall I say maltreatment, leads us to believe that we are unimportant, disqualified, and worthless. Along the way, we begin to feel devalued and dishonored. We are not viewed as ones who are made in the image of God.

In the book, The Sacred Romance, the authors (B. Curtis & J. Eldredge) wrote, "We come into the world longing to be special to someone and from the start we are disappointed. It is a rare soul indeed who has been sought after for who she is -- not because of what she can do, or what others can gain from her, but simply for herself..." "Can you recall a time when a significant someone in your life sat down with the sole purpose of wanting to know your heart more deeply, fully expecting to enjoy what they found there?" (p. 83)

"More people have climbed Mount Everest than have experienced real pursuit and so what are we left to conclude? ... That there is nothing in our hearts worth knowing. Who ever and what ever this mystery called 'I' must be, it can not be much." (p. 84)

God designed women with unique longings and desires. It is no "mistake" that we desire to be loved. It is not "weird" to want to be wanted. It is God's divine design. It is NORMAL. These are right and good. If you have ever studied psychology, you know that every person NEEDS to be touched. We need to be given attention. We need safe attachments; we need to feel secure and significant."

Personally, I believe that every woman needs to know that she is: lovable and valuable; attractive and beautiful; interesting and worth being pursued. Every woman needs to know that her presence makes a difference and she brings something unique to every situation. She needs reassurance that the future will not always be as bleak as it now seems.

She needs to experience healthy dynamics in each of her unique relationships (as wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend). She needs to be believe that there are a "few" people with whom she can really be herself and still be accepted ... if not celebrated.

All of these deep needs can be and will be met in our relationships with: God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. As we know each person of the God-head for who they really are ... and ... as we are able to love them and be loved by them, our deepest needs will be met. When these transactions happen we will become increasingly settled in our souls. As the love, acceptance, forgiveness, blessings, grace, mercy, (and everything else that one receives when they enter into the family of God), we will walk in a manner worthy of our calling.

We will not feel compelled to prove that we are OK or prove that we have value. We will have the ability to be in silence and solitude and not feel lonely at all. We will experience the peace of God which surpasses all comprehension. How does this happen? When we get to a place when we seek God simply for who He is and not for what He does. When we stop approaching Him as our "vending machine in the sky"; the "man" upstairs; our co-pilot; or a "god" we simply put in a box and only call on him when we need or want something; when we truly experience His love, character and ways; when we accept that we are unequivocally forgiven, adored, and accepted by the God of the universe ... something within us happens. We begin to see Him as He is. He is the father that we always wanted but never had. He is the nurturer we longed for but never knew. He is the friend who is always faithful and He is the husband who will never leave us nor forsake us. When we really know God, something happens on the inside of us as women. We begin seeing ourselves as the daughters of a King and sisters of a Prince. We more readily accept the idea that there is a power-source indwelling us, who is able to give us courage, wisdom, power, determination, and perhaps most importantly ... HOPE. Think about it ...

Beside you in Christ,

Murphy

Interesting Article ... Take a look

2009-05-13T11:49:00.002-05:00

This is a great article on how to treat people personally and professionally. It will bless you and probably teach you how to improve your ability to connect with those around you.

Just click the title to read the article.

Enjoy!

In Him, Murphy

The Power of Love

2009-05-04T18:30:00.006-05:00

Love is an amazing phenomenon. It's created by God and demonstrates His character, nature, and His steadfastness because He IS love.

Love has several expressions: brotherly love (friendship), sexual love, familial love, and the purest, most perfect love agape. Agape love wants what is best for the person being loved. It is steadfast, sacrificial, and without guile.

God's love is: patient, kind, not jealous. It doesn't brag and is not arrogant. His love doesn't act unbecomingly. It does not seek its own, is not provoked, and does not take into account a wrong suffered. God's love rejoices with the truth. Godly love is healing and transforming.

God's love offers acceptance; total acceptance. It disarms self-protectors, outlasts cynics, strengthens the weary, and fosters transformation. We learn the best when we feel the safest (Byron Kehler). When we KNOW we're loved, we can examine ourselves without fear of condemnation and retaliation. Self-examination leads to correct understanding and proper allocation of responsibility.

Godly love bears up underneath great stress and strains (bears all things). It believes the best of others, the best of God, and the best of ourselves believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Godly love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a).

Love never fails! Love never fails! Love never fails! Our anger will fail because the anger of a man will not achieve the righteousness of God (James 1). Our manipulation will fail. Our adroit persuasion will fail. Only love will never fail.

What does this look like? It boils down to loving someone well enough and long enough, through the power of the Holy Spirit, thereby creating a divine opportunity for transformation. Interestingly, both the giver and the receiver of this kind of love are changed for the better.

Ask the Father to enable you to love others with the love of Christ. Blessings to you all. m

Hairline Fractures

2009-05-04T14:01:00.011-05:00

Question: Is a hairline fracture ever good?

Take your time and think about your answer. (Repeat the question: Are hairline fractures ever good?) What is your opinion?

Common sense leads us to believe that hairline fractures are NEVER good because they represent a place of weakness in a bone. The slightest hairline fracture creates vulnerability. Too much weight and stress applied to that site results is a broken bone; even a compound fracture. This would never be a good thing!

If there is a hairline fracture in a wall near a window or a door frame, most of us would deduce that something is going on with the foundation of the house. Repairs could run up to thousands of dollars. That is never good.

What about a hairline fracture in a glass pitcher? Would that be bad? Of course it would be bad. The last thing you want at a dinner party is a pitcher that breaks in two; spilling a quart of sweet tea (it's a Southern thing) all over the lap of a guest.

Question: Is a hairline fracture ever good? Think for a moment.

Yes, there are times when hairline fractures are good. When a person has been the object of ridicule and cruelty, they usually begin to believe they are the problem. They believe they are defective and worthless. Surely their parents would not lie to them or falsely label them?!?! If they are blamed for everything and labeled by the family as the "identified patient," it must be true, right?

No, it may not be true at all. In fact, more times than not when people label their children, the root issue lies within the "label er" not the "labeled." Normal, loving, whole people don't go around labeling others. Dysfunctional, whack-a-doodle people (a professional term) will do anything to take the spotlight off themselves. Labeling, badgering, and belittling are ways to accomplish that goal.

Sadly, children do not have the capacity to discern the guile of dysfunctional parents. Children do not have the ego strength to counter the actions of caregivers. Innocent children are hard-wired by God to believe people, especially their parents.

So, is a hairline fracture ever good? The truth is, "Yes." When a wounded person is loved and accepted right where they are; when the love and care are consistent and persistent, they begin to develop hairline fractures in their belief system. When they are told good things, truthful things about who they really are (and especially who they are in Christ), hairline fractures appear... even in the thickest of protective walls. If they are affirmed long enough, blessed thoroughly enough, loved well enough, the hairline fractures of a wounded person begin to enlarge and the heavy weight of labels and accusations; blame and misplaced responsibility begin to break off that person. This is a glorious miracle of God. For a wounded person to see himself/herself as God sees them, it is life-giving and life-changing.

So, you see, some hairline fractures ... strategically placed by God can be exactly what a person needs. They are crucial in changing a person's self-concept. They are vital in aiding a person to become who God ordained them to be.

And on top of that, God will use people in our lives to be His truth-bearers. Their love, patience, kindness, goodness are used by the Father to create tiny cracks in our misguided belief systems. It is a glorious day when bad things break off of God's people.

Amen and Amen!

Caring For Others

2009-04-29T09:06:00.007-05:00

Yesterday was a 12 hour day for me. It was non-stop; yet, fulfilling. I saw growth taking place in the lives of my clients and supervisees and myself as well.

Yesterday afternoon, out of the blue, I received a text message that said, "Hey buddy, hang in there. U R almost on the last leg of UR marathon. Praying 4 U!!!! Love, U ... (the person's name.) I have to admit when I read the message, I broke into a huge smile. I smiled because I felt the fullness of care, concern, encouragement, and love sent by a friend through a text message. It was awesome. It was just what the doctor ordered.

Caring for others doesn't have to take an excessive amount of time or money. It can be expressed in the few seconds/minutes it takes to write a text message or a quick phone call. Caring doesn't have to be draining or taxing. Just letting a person know you are thinking of him or her makes a huge difference. Who doesn't want to feel loved or cared about? We all want to be thought of and loved. God made us this way.

That is why it is important to remember to reach out to people. Give them kind encouragement. Remind them of the truth about God, this world, other people and them as individuals:

* God is ... good, always good, and can never be anything but good. He can't be put in a box and He is not predictable. He is as wild as a lion, but always good. He is love. He is the perfect Father (who nurtures like a mother.) He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He will never leave you nor forsake you. He wishes that none should perish, but all have eternal life. He ears the cries of His people. An abundant life is attained through a relationship with Him.

* This world ... contains good and bad; godly and evil; reverence and contempt. It has natural rhythms; and unexpected chaos. It is difficult and yet, interesting; it is rewarding and yet, discouraging. It is full of troubles and woes. It seduces us into believing that it is heavenly, yet truthfully, it is hell on earth. It is a fallen world. It can never satisfy our longings. It is not God's best for us; the best is yet to come for those who place their trust in Jesus Christ.

* Other people ... are often the sources of our greatest hurts and deepest disappointments. In turn, people are the recipients of our best behavior and our worst revenge. Sometimes, God uses specific people as instruments of divine healing. As we engage with other people, we see the Christian life modeled; we see what it can look like. Some people are bent on doing great harm against their fellowman. Others are committed to loving others so well that emotional healing emerges. These brothers and sisters in Christ are unexpected sources of comfort, kindness, and hope.

* Ourselves ... We are capable of loving well and hurting deeply. We sometimes connect with others; sometimes we cut and run. We long to be known and loved, yet, we masterfully hide from ourselves and others on an as need basis. We are inclined to live life in extremes: I'm really great or I'm awful. In truth, no one is better than another. We all fall short of the glory of God. We applaud others one minute and curse them the next. We extend helping hands and we slap people in the face. We are loved by God with an incomprehensible love. He cherishes us. It is difficult for us to wrap our minds around God's son dying in our place for our sins. Our personal wellness is correlated to our maturity in Christ.

Ponder these thoughts.

Is there someone you need to call or text right now?

Is there someone you need to thank or express gratitude?

Is there someone you need to forgive or ask for forgiveness?

Ask God to show you who you are to care for right now, this moment. If He shows you, don't think about reaching out ... pull a "Nike" and "just do it."

much love, Murphy

Hope

2009-04-22T22:00:00.007-05:00

I was talking to a friend tonight on the phone. We were commiserating about some current difficulties and obstacles each of us are facing with kids, work, ministry, marriage, decisions, and such. Some of our concerns are comparatively minor; others become weightier with each passing day. Although the backdrop of our conversation was serious, laughter was lavishly sprinkled through out.

How could that be? Our laughter was rooted and grounded in our knowledge that as children (in fact, daughters) of a King, we are NOT TO LIVE AS THOSE WHO HAVE NO HOPE.

Our hope is not based on present circumstances or eleventh hour rescues; nor is our hope based on human intelligence or physical prowess. Our hope is firmly based on the consistent character, the kind intentions, the tender mercies and graces, and the supernatural love of God's Son, Jesus Christ. Our hope is generated through trust; through faith. To the degree that we embrace the truth that Jesus is sovereign over every event, every problem, every worry, and every outcome; to that same degree ... hope is generated.

When Jesus rose from the dead, the Holy Spirit brought that which was dead back to life. This indelibly demonstrated that when a situation seems the darkest, there is hope. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and the darkest hour is just before dawn. Believing God is able to raise us from the "dead," creates a resiliency the world can not understand, manufacture, or imitate. Supernatural resiliency founded on the love and goodness of God; always yields supernatural hope.

Are you in a situation that feels hopeless?
Does it seem as though there is no way out; no way to resolve your dilemma?
Don't forget to draw hope from the God who loves you.

Developmental Stages

2009-04-19T17:17:00.003-05:00

Usually, when we think about "developmental stages," we have our children in mind. The truth is, however, when our kids go through their developmental stages, we as parents navigate through developmental stages too.

When children are small, parents are thrilled to watch them go through the appropriate developmental stages. You remember: turning over, holding up their head, laughing, rocking, pulling up, crawling, one-word sentences, multiple word sentences. It is all just one big celebration after another. Most parents have Hallmark calendars (complete with stickers) to record each event so they can remember what happened and where it happened. It was thrilling.

In the beginning, it is as though the parents are cheering and rooting for their child to successful complete each expected marker of development. When the child is delayed, we fret and worry that something might be wrong. When they breeze through the various stages, we think our child is off-the-chart in intelligence and we are sure they will go to some prestigious university.

At some point, especially around the teenage years, our children start pulling at us because they are chomping at the bit to do all the things that they see as markers of adolescence. They can't wait to: spend the night over at a friends, go to dances, drive the family car, get a car of their own, go away to college, get a job, live in the dorm, and many more. During this time period, the parents are almost universally putting on the brakes because the stages are flying by and we feel out of control. Parents don't think these stages are nearly as much fun as the kids do. The parents would much rather prefer for things to go back to the way things were when their child was in elementary school.

When our children "launch" from home, meaning: when they graduate from college or trade school; get a job; move out of the house; live independently and make their own choices, parents pretty much begin to freak out. The maturing process of the kids is going so fast that the parents feel uncomfortable with the rapid pace. Parents are scared to death because they just don't have the control they once did.

Truthfully, it is a good and right thing for our children to grow up. The goal of parenting is to launch our children successfully. Even though we struggle with the new-found independence of our children, we need to try to go along with as much as we can. We need to allow them the room to grow up and the opportunity to fail. That's how our children will grow the most: taking things one step at a time and calling on the wisdom of God (and our wisdom if they seek it) in order to make wise, appropriate decisions.

Are you having trouble letting your adult children go?

Do you still seek to control and yet you call it influence?

What do you think that is really about?

Could it be that we are so afraid that God won't come through for them that we feel as though we need to take care of the matter ourselves?

Ask the Father how well you are doing in allowing your adult children to grow up? See what He says and then be prepared to make some adjustments if necessary. God is a much better parent than we could ever hope to be. Allow Him to have enough space in the lives of your children. To do this, you might have to actually get out of the way.

Think about it ...

Maundy Thursday

2009-04-09T14:02:00.008-05:00

(M. Toerner, 2004, Episcopal Church)

Today is Maundy Thursday. Tonight there will be scores of churches all over the country commemorating the Last Supper. I wonder what the Lord thought about as he approached the upper room. I wonder what he felt when Peter proclaimed his loyalty. I wonder what he experienced when Judas dipped the bread into the wine and subsequently betrayed Jesus in the garden with a kiss.

The only way to survive it all was to maintain a close, personal intimacy with His Father in heaven. Jesus was intentional about staying close to His Father. Often, He would depart from big groups and settle in a deserted place to pray ... to commune ... to meditate and to hear God.

Their connection, their relationship empowered Jesus to endure great hardship just like a righteous oak planted by a stream of water is empowered and strengthen to withstand powerful wind, destructive hail, and drought.

With each of these questions, literally try to "picture" Jesus' face, heart, mind, and eyes as He is experiencing each of these situations. Put yourself in close proximity to the Lord so that you can get a good, sound imaginary look.

Then, answer the following questions:

What do you think Jesus was feeling in the upper room?

What did He feel and think when Peter pledged his loyalty?

What did He experience knowing His betrayal was imminent?

How did it feel to be kissed by a close friend and companion while in the act of betraying you?

During this Easter weekend, take the time to meditate on the fact that Jesus was a real man, who endured real suffering, and died a real death and burial.

BTW, He experienced a real resurrection too. Can you imagine what that must have been like?

WOW!

Blessings, murphy

Successful Parenting

2009-04-08T10:44:00.001-05:00

Christian parents have two goals. They want their kids to: act right and be right. Christians tend to believe that if their kids are good (or perfect), the parents feel as though they successfully accomplished their job. If their kids turn our right, it proves Christianity pays off.

It doesn't take long for these parents to come to their senses and realize this approach to parenting is hog-wash. A better approach emerges as parents purposefully and intentionally connecting to their children. Having a solid emotional connection with children enhances their influence on their children. Emotionally connecting to their children does not assure success, but it is usually helpful. Christian parents would do well to relax a bit and realize there is only one Perfect parent. He presents an excellent model for healthy parenting.

Being a Christian does not insure parental success. It does, however, strengthen the odds for a positive outcome, but there's no guarantee. The ultimate goal of parenting is successfully launching children into the world of work. Parents also hope their children will choose to live for God and be a productive member of society.

Sometimes parents lose sight of the original goals and get side-tracked. They narrow their focus. When this happens, they are more concerned about their children looking right and acting right than they are about being right or having a right heart.

If you ever see that you are going down the performance road, stop dead in your tracks. Don't go one step further. No positive consequence with come from requiring perfection from our children. It will only beget rebellion. Be wise. Love your children well. Lead them toward Jesus and equip them for being on their own when they launch from your home.

You are Not Alone ...

2009-04-07T23:01:00.002-05:00

(M. Toerner; Beach Club; February, 2008)

One of the kindest things one Christian can do for those around him or her is to be authentic. Authenticity is the foundation of truth and truth consistently brings freedom.

One of the oldest tricks Satan uses is to influence people to believe they are the only ones who struggle with _____, referring to a specific issue or sin. The classic metaphor that describes this is the lone sheep being separated from the other ninety-nine. When one sheep (or person) is singled out, they are singularly more vulnerable. They are easier prey for predators. Thankfully our good Shepherd will search until He finds us.

Authenticity, sincerity, and truth show others how similar we all are. Every one struggles with jealousy. It is the context of jealousy that differs. Every one struggles with lust or the temptation to lie. Every one is tempted to steal, cheat on taxes, or exceed the speed limit on the interstate. Truly, all of us are tempted to commit the same sins. The Bible verifies this, "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23) and "The wages of sin is death" (Romans 6:23).

Knowing that all of us miss the mark of perfection (sin), asserts that we are not alone. We have many traveling companions and we all are tempted by the same enemy. I Corinthians 10:13 substantiates this, "No temptation has overtaken you, but such is as common to man, but God is faithful. He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation, He will provide a way of escape so that you will be able to endure it (bear up underneath it.)"

Authenticity forces us to reveal our real-self as opposed to our public-self. Authenticity makes us take our "Stepford Christian" masks off and get real about what is going on in our lives, whether it is good or bad. Freely talking about real life struggles reveals the truth that we all struggle with the same kinds of issues. We all commit the same kinds of sin. As we come clean, we show the world we are in this together. We are making the journey through life with true companions.

So, when Satan tells you the lie, "You are the only one who struggles with ____! No one else struggles as you do. No one will understand. If anyone really knew all of these secret things about you, they would not like you at all. They would know that you are worthless and shameful," don't believe a word he says. He is a consummate liar, thief, deceiver, and seducer. He wants to keep you down and despondent. God wants you to know you are not alone.

Perspective

2009-04-06T15:55:00.000-05:00

(Photo by M. Toerner; March/2009)

Is this a sunrise or a sunset? Your answer will depend on your perspective. Looking at the picture, can you be 100% sure it's the early morning light of a new day? Are you confident it's the sun peaking its yellow head above the horizon? Or, could it be capturing the day's final, fleeting moments? Your answer will be based on your perspective.

Perspective is the view we take of something or someone. It is how we "see" a person, thing, or situation. Perspective is individual specific. It's the proverbial, "You see the glass as half-full or half-empty." Often siblings have different memories and interpretations of their family of origin because their perspectives differ.

Having a personal relationship with God changes a person's eternal destination. It also changes their earthly perspective. God sees and perceives perfectly. To Him, a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years is like one day. He is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent. He understands what we do and why we do it. Because of His perfect maturity and perfect wisdom, He perceives properly and accurately.

As one is conformed to His image, he/she adopts this eternal perspective. It is as though they are able to see earthly things from a heavenly vantage point. It is the heavenly vantage point that enables one to stay calm during a storm, to not react to a child's tantrums, to not own what they are not responsible for.

Always ask yourself how God might look at a situation, a person, or whatever. Search for this divine perspective. It is always there. Remember the more you practice seeing as God sees, the easier it gets. (BTW, the above picture is of a sunset. Just in case you were interested.)

Blessings,

Murphy

Appreciate the Little Things

2009-04-05T02:00:00.006-05:00

(Photo by M. Toerner; November, 2008)

One morning the Lord woke me up about 4:30 a.m. Usually when He does that, it is because He wants me to pray for someone or something. I never know 100% what He is up to, but it is always interesting.

On this particular morning, the Lord impressed me to get my camera and walk out onto our covered patio. I gladly did as I was "told." In those initial moments, all seemed forever dark and still. In those dark moments, I witnessed the colors and light of the pre-dawn sky subtly, yet assuredly, transform into a new day. It was amazing to behold; pure beauty.

Through the entire experience, I sensed the Lord whispering, "Good morning, sweetheart." It was as though He and I watched the initial hints of color press through the darkness. The sky was a mixture of maroon and black. It continued to morph into lighter and darker shades of pink and lavender. The limbs of the trees effortlessly reached toward the heavens like hands greeting the day with welcoming arms. The trees, the birds, the grass, and my own soul were mesmerized as we patiently awaited the transformation. We were not disappointed.

Watching the morning unfold created a deep sense of wonder. As the light slowly, softly changed, my heart, mind, strength, and soul felt the full impact of God's goodness and creativity. It was simply amazing. How precious it was of the Father to awaken me and invite me to join Him for the birth of a new day.

What are some ways the Father manifests Himself to you?

Do you see Him in the little things in your life?

Do you give Him credit for the beauty that surrounds you?

What are you most grateful for?

Don't forget that He is the Alpha and the Omega; the beginning and the end; the first and the last. Let's appreciate Him in all things, even in the little things of life.

Love, murphy

The First Step Toward Healing

2009-04-01T10:38:00.010-05:00

Photo by M. Toerner; December, 2007

The general definition of "trauma" is anything that leaves a lasting negative impact on one's life. According to this broad definition, all of us have experienced one or more traumatic events during our lifetime.

There are several categories of traumas. Physical traumas include things like: car accidents, sports injuries, excessive discipline, mistreatment by a bully, military action, domestic violence and more.

Emotional or psychological traumas include: abandonment, rejection, betrayal, teasing, sarcasm, poverty, neglect, unemployment, and others. Abuse of any kind, whether physical, emotional, psychological, or sexual, would be considered sources of trauma.

When you think about it, most traumatic events touch our lives because of the poor choices and/or mean-spirited actions of people. If a person drinks too much and causes a car accident, their choice to drink and drive caused a trauma. If a parent is immature and ill equipped and chooses to beat a small child because the child is crying, that child experiences a trauma. If a young girl is sexually abused by her father, mother, or brother, she is traumatized by their choices to sin.

Most often, we experience trauma at the hands of other people. Isn't that why we self-protect and withdraw? Isn't that why we shy away from vulnerability in relationships and refuse to cry or be emotional in front of others because we might appear weak? Our greatest injuries happen because of the willfulness of those around us.

Yet, we learn about healing and wholeness through the healthy relationships in our lives. Although some people may believe it is possible to become healthy and whole without a relationship with God, I know from personal experience that God is the greatest and most profound source of healing, health, and wholeness. Our relationship with God is founded on His love for us. It is a settling thing to know you are totally and completely loved and accepted by God. He knows everything you've done, are doing, and will do. He knows every sin and yet chooses to not hold the past against us. His wrath has been appeased by the blood of the Lamb, Jesus. He knows our thoughts and choices. His sense of and demand for justice is satisfied because Jesus paid for the sins of the world via His sacrificial death on the cross.

Have you experienced one or more traumas in your life? If you want to be healed, the first step is to establish a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. This is the first and foremost initial step toward healing because God becomes the most powerful, stable, unchanging source of strength, acceptance, love, and stability in your life. Do you have that kind of relationship with Him?

All Things ...

2009-03-28T00:19:00.005-05:00

Everything that happens to you is for your own good. If the waves roll against you, it only speeds your ship toward the port. If lighting and thunder comes, it clears the atmosphere and promotes your sol's health. You gain by loss, you grow healthy in sickness, you live by dying, and you are made rich in losses.

Could you ask for a better promise? It is better that all things should work for my good than all things should be as I would wish to have them. All things might work for my pleasure and yet might all work my ruin. Of all things do not always please me, they will always benefit me.

This is the best promise of this life. -- Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Do you believe this promise?

Is the God you worship big enough to cause everything to work together for your good?

Are you quick to blame God because he did not "perform" for you?

In your current situation, what is God trying to work into your life?

What's Wrong

2009-03-26T00:56:00.004-05:00

G.K. Chesterton (1874--1936) was an English journalist, theologian, philosopher, playwright, mystery writer, and more. Among his many great works are Saint Francis of Assisi, The Everlasting Man, The Man Who Would be Thursday, and Saint Thomas Aquinas.

When the London Times asked a number of writers for essays on the topic "What's Wrong with the World?" Chesterton sent in the shortest reply and one that was to the point:

Dear Sirs:

I am.

Sincerely yours,

G.K. Chesterton

What is wrong with our world today?

We are and unless we learn to love others and care about others the way Jesus did, there is little hope that the world will get better on its own. Let us all work toward creating a better world.

Blessings,

Murphy

Scenery People

2009-03-24T22:51:00.014-05:00

How do we survive family dysfunction? We learn to: fly under the radar, be seen and not heard, pursue perfection, obey promptly, play quietly, deny feelings, suppress thoughts, keep secrets, and tell adults what they want to hear.

In severely dysfunctional homes, we learn that dissociation, not dogs, is our best friend (even though it costs us huge portions of our memory). In order to survive, we learn to "X" ourselves out as people. Our joy, spontaneity, hope, and child-likeness is quashed and we intuitively know it is not safe to ask for what we want or need. When carried to an extreme, these defense mechanisms unequivocally change us from "real" people to "scenery" people.

What's so bad about "scenery" people? I'll tell you. "Scenery" people easily and effortlessly replicate and re-create themselves. In no time at all, one "scenery" person rubs off onto scores of others transforming them into dull, lifeless, disingenuous, inauthentic, uncaring, unloving droids, i.e. "scenery" people.

God never designed human beings to be pieces of scenery. We are created to be image bearers. We are made from muscle, bone, tendons, ligaments, blood vessels, and more. We have hearts and minds; personalities and temperaments. According to our original design, we are supposed to be open, honest, real, and transparent. We have eyes with which to see and ears with which to hear. Our hands and arms can touch, hold, and comfort. God gives us the ability and desire to love others and help others. We portray Him well when we fulfill His design.

Blessings,

Murphy

The Wide Open Spaces of God

2009-03-22T20:13:00.014-05:00

Photos by M. Toerner; 3/2009; Chapel Women's Retreat

If you have not yet read The Wide Open Spaces of God by Beth Booram, you need to. This is a poignant book about the various stages of life through which we navigate.

Some stages will be familiar to you: the valley of darkness, the valley of light; the valley of transition, the valley of the shadow of death; the valley of discouragement, the plateau of praise and worship; the valley of green pastures and quiet waters.

Do you know these places? Some of you know a few; others know them all.

Being in a specific "landscape" is not bad; it just is. If you are struggling with depression, it is not because one morning you woke up and said, "I know what. I want to get severely depressed today. I want the depression to overwhelm me so I can know the faithfulness of Jesus." Most assuredly you did not do such a thing. If you are in the valley of the shadow of death, you probably did not see it coming. However, once you entered that place, your only way out was through the faithful guidance of the Lord Jesus.

If you are currently in a green pasture, if you are experiencing the Father's peace, then you are truly blessed. God gives heavenly peace to His children. May His peace bring rest and hope to your weary soul. May His peace linger heavily upon you. May His grace, mercy, hope, and forgiveness enable you to rise above the fray.

Blessings,

Murphy

The Prayer of St. Patrick

2009-03-16T22:54:00.002-05:00

Christ be with me, Christ within me.
Christ behind me, Christ before me.
Christ beside me, Christ to win me.
Christ to comfort and restore me.

Christ beneath me, Christ above me.
Christ in quiet and in danger.
Christ in hearts of all that love me.
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.

How Open Is Your Spirit?

2009-03-14T17:05:00.006-05:00

Photos by M Toerner; July, 2008

When children are young, you can look at their faces and into their eyes and see that the spirit within them is WIDE open.

Children laugh and play easily; emerse themselves in the moment; express their feelings readily.

An open spirit allows a child to live with little or no shame or guilt. They don't know about how the world works. All they know is they are well loved and cared for.

Jesus tells us that unless we become like little children, we will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Mmmmmmm.

Consider for a moment, how open is your spirit ... right now ... this moment?

If it is open, that is wonderful!!!!

If it isn't, why isn't it?

Ask the Lord for insight or confirmation ... or ask Him for healing.

Les Miserables

2009-03-09T22:55:00.002-05:00

The Chapel on the Campus Youth Choir

presents

Les Miserables

Please check out the information at the churches website.

http://www.thechapelnet.com

The Five P's of Prayer

2009-03-08T14:55:00.002-05:00

Last year, I attended my first silent retreat. My spiritual director was a wonderful Christian sister named Bonnie Chase (from Slidell, Louisiana.) She taught me was the following ...

The 5 - P's of Prayer and Journaling

1. Passage of Scripture

Go to a particular scripture ... about 5 to 10 verses in length. Read over the passage before your prayer time; choose a favorite (or prescribed) passage or a Psalm, one that fits your mood or present situation.

2. Place ...

Go to a private place or spot where you can be alone with God. A place where you will be undisturbed and uninhibited.

3. Posture ...

Body posture is very important. At the beginning take time to settle yourself. Peacefully take the position that helps you feel most responsive to God's presence (i.e., sit, kneel, experiment with lying face down on the ground, etc.)

4. Presence of God ...

Respond to God's presence, peacefully reminding yourself how present He is with you during your time. Pray something like, "You love feeling into me;" "You love sight into me;" "You love life into me;" "You, God, indwell me;" and/or "Thank you for living in me, for loving goodness and faith INTO me."

This takes time. Never rush it, even if it takes the whole period.

5. Passage from Scripture ...

There may be no time left to read the Scripture passage. That is OK. However, there may be enough time left to read the passage. For instance, if after a brief response to God's presence, you feel finished or even empty, God may be inviting you to listen to Him as He speaks to you through the Scriptures. Turn to the passage you selected and very slowly read the passage out loud.

A. If it is an action story, watch the activity. Allow yourself to join in the activity, to listen to the words, to catch the expressions on the faces of the people involved and the feelings they feel. Allow yourself to ask the characters in the passage some questions. Also, you can ask your own questions and you can speak out about the passage from your heart.

B. If it is a teaching passage, listen to the words spoken as though they were spoken direction to you. In a very real sense, they were spoken to you.

Avoid: Don't spend time searching for profound meanings or novel resolutions. This is not the time for that. Just simply spend time watching and speaking to the LORD and to the other characters included in the passage.

When your time is up, thank God for speaking to you. Carry your visit with the LORD into the rest of the day.

Journaling ...

Writing down your experience can help you to discern the movement of the LORD's Spirit in your life. The time you spend in prayer and journaling will vary, depending on your choice of passage and your ability to take it all in.

Consider doing this exercise for any where from fifteen minutes to an hour a day (if possible.) It can revolutionize your intimacy with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Reflection

2009-03-05T00:25:00.005-06:00

(Video by M Toerner; 2/2009)

Watch the video:

What do you see? What do you hear?

What is present? What is missing?

What is powerful? What is weak?

With what do you identify? ... the drift wood, the sense of peace, the surf, the sun?

Are you drawn to God? Do you feel indifferent? Is anything repelling?

Reflect for a moment; slow down and think; what is God showing you?

Special Places

2009-03-04T01:21:00.003-06:00

(Photo by MToerner; 2/2009)

Recently I had the privilege of going to the beach. I needed some time away from work and responsibility; from phone calls and the demands of normal life.

During the winter, the beach is very quiet. A few "snow-birds" rent condos there in order to escape the brutal cold, ice, and snow of the north. There are a few folks visiting from surrounding states who are there for very short vacations. But for the most part, it is slower, calmer, and more restful than during the summer time. It is beautiful, peaceful, and intimate. The beach feels like a "holy" place especially during the winter.

Beach time allows times to reflect, to rest, and to restore our souls. If you have the luxury of being there with a spouse or a friend, it is a perfect place to connect on deeper levels. Talking late into the night, walking on the beach looking for special shells and avoiding bright blue jelly-fish are opportune times to connect, converse, and engage. Watching movies that bring tears to your eyes and then discussing the meaning you gleened are fun and intimate. Sharing deep thoughts produces a sense of being known and loved; a sense of connection and trust.

I think God created special places like the beach to give us unique opportunities to see His nature expressed in creation. The beach is a place where the natural tempo of life is retarded and slowed; it is so different from real-life time. The sunsets are breath-taking; the sun-rises are too. The entire package produces a deep sense of awe.

I so loved my time away. And yet, let me ask you what does God use in your life to slow you down and help you rest? Where do you go to be quiet and thoughtful. Where do you slip away to regain your balance and your peace?

I hope you have such a place. It is the key to being and staying healthy -- mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. If you were to look at your life right now, would you see the need to find a place to get away? If you do, please do something about it. Please care for yourself.

Don't Quit Too Soon

2009-02-25T19:57:00.003-06:00

We are a generation of gratification seekers and fulfill my expectations demanders. What a sad commentary. When our food arrives in 4 minutes instead of 2, we notoriously act out our contempt. How many of us regularly treat others with long-suffering and patience?

We demand dignified treatment from others, but whenever they fail, which undoubtedly they will, we respond with disgruntled disapproval. Every day, we go through our day with a very distinct "back-drop." We want what we want, when we want, and with whom we want; and it should have been delivered yesterday. Much like an undisciplined toddler, we want things NOW.

Being demanding and impatient with those around us leads more to covenant-breaking rather than covenant-keeping. We repel one another because of our immaturity, selfishness, and self-centeredness. We don't consider the fact that it truly takes a life-time for God to heal us from our hurts and conform us into the image of Christ.

Yes, it takes a long, long, ... long, long, ... long, long, long, time for us to grow up. Truly, it takes a life-time.

There are times in our lives when we are given permission from God to "self-protect" in our most intimate relationships. That might require that we cut down the time we spend with some people. We might have to set some clearly stated boundaries in order to regain some deserved respect. It is, however, not uncommon for God to direct us to "get back in there" with someone who has been very tough to love.

Humans tend to want to just cut people off at the knees and run away from difficult relationships. How often do we start fresh with people who hurt us. (Now, I'm not saying that if your spouse is beating you up you are supposed to stay in that relationship even if it costs you your life. That would be imprudent.) God will give us His direction as His eternal framework plays itself out.

No matter what happens in your relationships, don't ever give up hope that God is able to change a person's heart. Sometimes a person has to get old and weak for their bitterness, control, and meanness to lose their potency.

Always ask God what He wants you to do. He will direct your path.

Love to you all, Murphy

Another World - C.S. Lewis

2009-02-20T14:18:00.002-06:00

"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." -- CS Lewis

Being Remembered

2009-02-19T22:16:00.007-06:00

Photo by M Toerner; June, 2008; Rome, Italy

This is a statue in the Piazza Navona. A piazza is a large open area like an open square. This one had two big fountains. The two figures in the photograph represent two architects. The story goes that two architects were working on the same building. They were jealous and envious of each other and they wanted to discredit one another.

The figure in the fore-ground, whose head is covered by a cloth, represents the distain and hatred of its creator for the other man. He did not want to gaze upon the other man's lesser work. To make his point, he created this figure whose entire head is blinded and covered.

The figure in the background, with his hand held up as though is he protecting himself, was created by the other architect. It represents the idea that the other builder was not trust-worthy. His posture is suggesting that the part of the building created by his rival is about to fall on him.

Can you believe that these guys? They created and carved these two statues which have revealed the hardness of their hearts toward one another for centuries. Jealousy and callousness are not productive sources of inspiration. How sad! These two artists are not remembered for the architecture of the building in the background; they are remembered for the "in your face" commentaries made by these two figures. It is regrettable that hard-hearts and hatred are their lasting legacy.

Do you have any "statues" in your heart which communicate your hardness of heart; your unforgiveness; your envy, distrust, and lack of respect for another? Don't be remembered for this type of attitude.

Instead, be remembered for the quality and consistency of your: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. What do you think you will be most remembered for? Praying for you, Murphy